Lunch with Johnny and Maria, Christmas 2022

Linda and Gary are in Park City and Maria and Johnny will be at Johnny's work location near Walnut Creek, Ca.  Johnny added these poinsettias to the front porch and Maria put some presents under the tree.  They had invited James and I to lunch and we went to Miguel's by McDonalds and had excellent food and talk.  I had made her and Johnny some raisin bars and cookies.

Had not seen them since I went to Utah in 2021!!!!

  

On Christmas Day we opened the presents Maria had left and I received this lovely cup that Maria sells on a site.  She does the art, etc herself as therapy and is now making a business of her art.  Very nice!

Thanksgiving Today.

Yesterday I rode with James to take Camber her burrito, etc that she had requested.  James was in with her for awhile so I practiced the songs I sing to Rowan to try and remember all the words I have forgotten!!!!  I will have to request the words to some on my phone.

UCSD has refused to take Camber though a doctor there said he would treat her.  They are low on beds and need the ones they have for their Emergency Room patients.  They also don't like lateral patients (move from one hospital to another).  She is also not eating except for the burrito, etc James brings her each day she requests it.  They have to use a IV and she will not go to the bathroom or open her eyes except occasionally say something.  She has been in the hospital almost 50 days or so.  She tries to fight off the meds but is very weak.  She will not cooperate in any means to get herself well.

James told me yesterday that 2 and 1/2 years ago when they were lunching at their favorite french restaurant in the mall that she began to keep her eyes closed and not comb her hair or anything.  She had had the trauma of remembering her next door neighbor and the abuse he gave her when she was around 11 or 12 when they were in court and a pedophile was before the judge.  With all the other stresses of what is going on in their life she just went into a deep depression and got worse and worse.  She refused to leave her room or care for herself or eat or open her eyes.  Just stayed in bed all day with the TV on part of the time.

One night she became hysterical and Jacob took her to the hospital because he did not know what else to do and she has been there ever since.  It is so sad.  Linda sent me a picture or laying there but asked me not to share.  Sooo so sad and James feels so guilty for all the stress she has do to his current problems.  He also had a heart attack about 2 and a half years ago and is being treated for diabetes.

He stays sane only because he is currently working with Kent on a marketing project they have been hired for and it takes lots of planning and work but may just be the way to get income into the home again.     

Carlsbad Beach

James came by and we went sunset watching in Carlsbad and then over to the Jay and he had some spaghetti and I had an appetizer of calimari in white wine garlic sauce.  Really good.  This is across the street from the Carlsbad Inn.  Lots of people out, difficult finding parking.

Sharing Thoughts from Maria, James and Linda about their Father on Father's Day, 2018

Maria worked closely with Richard as his assistant for several years and she knew best about his business troubles and how he struggled to make everything work during that last fiasco which destroyed his financial world and probably his life.  She wrote a beautiful long talk about Richard which is in his memoirs.  Let me share just the ending for this Father's Day.  She was living in another city at this time.

"I never worked for Dad after all that, it was pretty disheartening to be a part of such a difficult time, it caused us a lot of stress not only because we worked there but seeing how difficult it was for Mom and Dad.  Dad tried hard to shield Mom from how bad things were but she knew.  I wrote in my journal one day during that time that Mom had started crying to me because of all the problems that were going on and the frustration she felt toward Dad. it really scared me because my mom never cries, in fact, I only saw her cry one other time in my life.

Dad did his best to make the project work, but too many things were working against him, he didn't have a chance.  Constantly putting more money in so they could get it done and get out.  Those who were involved with him, his investors, those who stayed close to what was going knew it also.  Even through all that, even through the money the investors lost, and the fiasco of the project, his investors, his clients, still think the world of him.  Once the project started, there was no quitting, it had to be seen through to the end.  He couldn't have walked away if he wanted to, there were so many loose ends that needed to be tied up for any of the partners to walk away, it wasn't just Dad, they were all stuck like glue to the bitter end.  It was definitely these projects that financially ruined Dad.

Interestingly enough though, the worse things got, the more Dad read and shared his insights and testimony.  When I was having a difficult time with money and he felt bad that he had none to give, he had great wisdom to share instead.  He always stayed positive in his views and was a wonderful example of perseverance, integrity, and courage.  

My Dad may have died penniless, but he was wealthy to me, wealthy in all the things that mattered."

I found this from a talk that James gave in 2001.  I think it is beautiful the way he talked about Richard's testimony.  The talk was on Testimony.

"In preparing for this talk I thought of my Dad who passed away a few years ago.  He lived a successful life in business and as a father and as a husband.  He enjoyed a full life of boats, cars, dream homes, and dream vacations. Yet toward the end of his life, his business was not as successful.  His net worth was dismal and his car was less than desirable. Yet I believe his last years he spent reflecting on his life.  Wondering at times if he had done all he could.  Wondering at times if he had accomplished all that he should have. 

 A few years before he passed away he was called as a Temple worker.  He told me when he was first called he was concerned that he didn't have time, with his business being less than optimal, but he had never turned down a call.  While at the Temple often his thoughts were focused on his life.  The example he had lived, the people whose life he had touched and served.  He was a great missionary who bared his testimony often. I think of what he left and what he took to the other side.  He left his testimony.  And he took his testimony.  And today he is still busy about his Father's business."

Linda gave a wonderful Father's Day talk a few years ago and included a little about Richard's background so I am including it as well as her thoughts about him to show how it probably influenced how he became the charitable and kind person he was.

"To give a little background of my Dad, his own father passed away when he was just 11 years old.  He was the youngest of 3 brothers and his mother worked very hard to raise 3 boys alone.  Money was scarce and life was hard.  I think that at some point in my father's life he made a decision that his own children would never have to experience the same hardships he did. And he did accomplish that goal.  My father worked very hard to provide his family with the things that he so desired as a child. But at the same time, it was also very important to him that we knew that the material things we enjoyed in this life in no way made us better or worse than someone else.   I received very few scoldings from my father but I do remember him being very disappointed in me when in my youth I didn't want to give someone a ride to the dance.  He made it very clear that as long as I was living in his house and driving his cars that I would give this person and any other person that called a ride to the dance.  He was a very generous and non-judgemental person.  If we spoke unkindly about someone's behavior or looks he would point out that we don't know enough about that person's background to make assumptions about this person and the things he does or doesn't do. 

 He was never too busy to help someone who needed him and I never heard him speak unkindly of anyone.  He owned his own business and often hired people not because they would be an asset to him and his company but because he could provide an opportunity to train this person and give them some skills they couldn't get somewhere else.  I remember one young man that he hired who had no desirable work skills.  But my father gave him a car to drive and simple tasks and errands that he could perform.  This young man was not very responsible and at one point he even stole from my Dad.  But my father never got angry or talked poorly about him, and he did not let him go.  He knew he was a troubled youth without a father or anyone to guide him, and he saw a chance for him to make a difference in someone's life.  His attitude was that if someone stole from him, they probably needed it more than he did.  

My Dad was a great example of a person with charity.  He was always more concerned with other's needs than his own."

A Good Day!

Today was a good day, even if it was too hot!  Talked to James this morning, he is back East, and then Mitch called and he was on his way up!

I fed him a big breakfast and then he washed his clothes and took a long nap, he had driven in the night from Big Creek (near Fresno).  My only regret is that I did not take a picture, he looks so buff!!!

We looked at the trees I need to have cut, they are a little bigger than he has approval to do, but that is what he is doing for the Forest Service, he is a Faller.  That is a high paying job on the non-government payroll but a dangerous business.  I think he is really enjoying his time there, he took back his music and game stuff and clothes with him, he will be there through November!

Mitch did a couple of handyman things for me, we had Chicken tacos and then he folded his clothes, loaded his car with all his things and then he was off again, planning on stopping in Tahoe to see Matt.

After I left I read an email from an old friend and that reminded me of something on my blog and I went in and watched the grandchildren singing at Richard's funeral.  They were so good, amazing that on such short notice, they did so well.

And then I listened to James' talk and it was wonderful as was Bob Wells.  It was really a lovely funeral and I am so glad I can go back and listen again, I am sure I did not remember much from that day.

Then I noticed a call from our RS president and I called her back.  She wanted to make sure I was sincere about wanting to leave teaching in RS.  I have such a hard time because my throat gets so dry, etc.  I realized I have been teaching for 60 years though and I think that is quite enough so I eagerly told her YES!.  She didn't want me to feel they did not want me...

Yea, that means I do not need to order the HDMI connection as I will not need to show anymore videos at RS now.  That is good.

Matt called looking for Mitch, he says he has a new girlfriend he really likes and he is bringing her up to meet me.  Now that is good news!