Financial Situation Stress

  I need to put down on paper how I am feeling because I can't really tell anyone.  They would not understand anyway.  I wouldn't have.  To grow old with not enough money to be secure and independent is to lose dignity, self-worth, and joy in living.  You go to sleep every night crying and praying for a miracle.  You feel like your life has been long enough, you do not want to go on living with the pain.  You don't want to tell anyone how you feel because you used to be a capable person who could cope with life and you are ashamed to tell anyone you are not that same person.

About $1000 a month stands between dignity and despair.  Another $1000 a month would make me rich.  How to bridge that gap.  I should be able to work but up here the pay is so low I would probably have to work full time at a hatefull job.  I am 68 years old and starting over!!!!  I just can't bear it--so many years of doing something I hated and not having time for the important things in life has just destroyed my will to do it again.  I would really rather die.  I am ready to go and yet I know it is cowardly not to live a full and useful life to the end of your days gracefully and with a smile.

Today I received "found" money from an old Virginia Colony account at Bank of America.  No one could have gotten it out but me and I didn't think I could so it sat there for 4 and 1/2 years with B of A just taking their fee out every month.  I am sure it was an answer to my prayer to find it but I am not sure it is really mine after all and so I feel guilty about that.  It meant so much to be to be able to sit down and pay my bills and taxes but it is still not enough.  I need another $1268 just to get down to paying for the basics of living.  John said I could not afford a house.  I cannot, but I cannot afford to live anyplace else either except with someone and at least I am building up equity here.  I bought this house for $118,000 and the realtors say there is nothing in Lake Almanor for under $150,000 anymore.  It has become in demand.  My mortgage is only $88000, but the payment is too high.  But I feel very humble that $2600 made such a difference in my life.  It is not a large amount and I would not have appreciated it near so much when I was working and making  money.

Christmas 2000

Two big things happened this year.  We had our 50 year High School Reunion for Classes 49, 50, 51 and 52 in the summer and it was so fun.  In the fall I went on the Best of Scandinavian Transfalgar Tour which was marvelous.  I also had training for SBA employment!!

Three of my best friends in school, Myrna, Raine, and Kay

Martin and Kathy were at Park City, too.

Park City again!!!

John and Quinnie, she has a restaurant in Park City

Events in 2000 at Lake Almanor

 

Oslo and then to Sea, London, and Home-Day, 18, 19, 21, 22

After spending more time in Oslo in the morning for last minute shopping  we drove to Kristiansand to board our 'mini-cruise' across the North Sea to England.  The liner had bars, restaurants, and a nightclub.  All cabins had shower and private facilities.  It was very luxurious.  We had an inside cabin and it was small but nice.  We spent most of our time outside.

I am not sure why we didn't take pictures but we had one of the most lavish buffets I have ever had.  The food was marvelous.  We sat at long tables and I was tucked way in the end and so had to pass everyone at my table when I would get more food.  One of the men (not from our group) was at the end and slightly drunk.  When I came back from loading my plate the last time he said he would not let me by unless I kissed him so all eyes were on me to see what I would do.    I quickly kissed him on the cheek and he let me pass.  My party was very surprised.  I think he was, too.  But what would you do, start a scene???

Day 19 we spent at Sea and wandered the ship and viewed the scenery.  There was much you could buy, of course.  After we docked at New Castle, our coach brought us back to London, arriving in the late afternoon.

We stayed at the same hotel we had stayed when we arrived and we did some evening touring and I remember I had the Garlic smashed potatoes with the Salmon and cream sauce again.  I wish I could duplicate it.

 

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Our driver and Tour Director--this is truly a nice way to travel, but it is not cheap.

We took a final picture before leaving our Coach.  It was an interesting group, mostly older people, of course.  There were a few single young people, however.  The most interesting of the group was a lady with her black husband, he was most friendly and helpful and the couple from Australia.  They are the second man on the right with the blonde wife behind him.  He was very funny and they were lovely to talk to.   Made me want to see Australia.   There was also an older well traveled couple which gave us lots of advice.  We were the novices it seemed.

Day 20 we went to the airport, back to Houston and then finally on to San Diego.  The flight back was very tiring and we were so glad to get home.  It was a wonderful trip but it was getting very long and that trip across the ocean is very, very long.  It was Day 22 when I finally said farewell to Denice.  We had to settle our money later as she had borrowed a lot from me since she had such a problem with her ATM and never wanted to go into the exchange places.  I was very appreciative to her for letting me travel with her.  It was very pleasant.   Four years in the planning and then her daughter bailed out on her.  Many thanks to James and Camber for giving me the trip of a lifetime.

Oslo Sightseeing-Day 17

  We stayed at the Scandic Hotel in Oslo.  In the morning we had a guided sightseeing tour of an Old Cathedral and the Royal Palace and then we visited the Vigeland Sculpture Park.  We must have marveled at Vigeland's "Story of Life" through his naked body scultures.

 

 

 

We also visited the Vikingskipene Museum.


We learned that a Queen and her maid would be buried in a large ship with everything they would need for the next life, such as a sleigh, cooking utensils, a cart, money, textiles.

 

 

 

We also visited the Polar Vessel "Fram".  This veteran of polar exploration went the furthest north and the furthest south of any of the ships.

We also saw the Kon-Tiki   and other ships at the Kon-Tiki Museum.  The Kon-Tiki crossed the Pacific in 1947.

Thor Heyerdahl (1914-2002) is one of history’s most famous scientists, adventurers and champions of the environment. The Kon-Tiki Museum houses original boats and exhibits from Thor Heyerdahl’s world famous expeditions.

 

And the Ram II which crossed the Atlantic in 1970.  The idea was to see where the ships would drift to.



Another thing I found out is that the early ancestors of my ancestors was probably the Vikings!!

 

Os-Bergen to Geilo and then to Oslo-Day 15 and 16

We spent the morning of Day 15 exploring Bergen but we must have been tiring of posing bccause we didn't take any pictures.  Then we drove via the Voringfoss waterfall and continued across the bleak Hardangervidda to the beautiful resort town of Geilo.

This was such a charming place, great place to come skiing.  We sat by the fire at night and listened to a Group from Bulgaria sing American songs from 40's to 60's.  What fun, you had to listen really well but they were sweet.

 

Geilo

Next morning we traveled through the narrow Hallingdal Valley to emerge among the trim farms of  Ringerike.  Then we pass by Honefass and through the town of Norderhov with its medieval church.  Later we enjoy the scenery as we travel between the Steinsfjord and Tyrifjordn en route to Norway's Capital of Oslo.

Actually I think we were still on the "Norway in a Nutshell" tour and part was by train and ferry as well as bus.  Finally we arrived in Oslo, our destination and the end of that tour--though you could do a round trip back.

 

Sognefjord to Bergen to Os-Day 14

Today we ascended the Vikafjeil to Voss and then descend to Bergen, Norway's most cultural and naturally beautiful city.

Our trip across this area the last two days was called "Norway in a Nutshell" and included train, ferry and bus to catch all the views.  Norway is a beautiful, beautiful place.

 

We have a sightseeing tour which includes the home Edward Grieg and one of the Stave Churches originally built in 1150 but reconstructed after a fire in 1992.

A Stave church according to Wikipedia is a medieval wooden church with a post and posand beam construction related to timber framing. The wall frames are filled with vertical planks.

 
All of the surviving Stave churches except one are in Norway and we saw a few along our journey. 

Home of Edward Grieg

We finally arrived  at our hotel in Os for a wonderful supper and free time to explore.

 

Geiranger to Sognefjord-Day 13

Actually this was a picture from the day before but more views like it as this is a day of driving and looking at the views.  We saw a lot of falls which I didn't pictures of for some reason but very beautiful.

The striking contrasts between the fjord and alpine peaks and between fertile field and snow and ice are characteristic of the Tafjordfjella mountains.

 

We stopped to view the Boyabreen glacier and I bought a card to show that the glacier has been shrinking every year.  Somewhere along here the Tour Director had a snack and a taste of Skol for everyone!



We finally reach the beauty of the Sognefjord Hotel.  We visited the Leikanger Church here and I think this is the place Denice and I went down to listen to some music being played in the bar that evening.

 

Herdelssetra (Summer Farm)-Day 12

We visit the largest dairy farm cooperative for goats in Norway.  The modern day farming is based on and at one with 300 years of tradition.  This summer farm with its 400 goats, some cows, sheep and horses is reached by a private toll road of high standard.

The goats were very friendly.

 

This was a fun experience and the bus trip was interesting as well.

 

The lady in blue is the manager of the farm.

 

 Denice kept encouraging me to mingle with the goats.

Young girls are in this little huts stirring the brown cheese.