Sadie

Sadie has just got to be the best dog in the world.  I have hardly had to use the leash at all when we are not walking.  She stays around the yard unless the people in back of me are out.  She does like to visit them as well as their dog.  Last week when I had to retrieve her so I could go to the movies she was not outside with their dog and the lady of the house, she was inside with the man of the house.  

She loves to supervise my watering and gardening and she sits and watches and follows me from front to back.  I know it is a big temptation when dogs are walking by to go out and greet them but she has learned if I remind her to come back or just sit and watch, and even when little children are talking to her she will just sit and watch.  She is not a barker and sometimes she will just sit and wait for me to let her in without uttering a sound or occasionally give a little cough to let me know she is there.  She follows me from room to room and when I want to stay up in the living room for awhile even though it is her bedtime she hesitates to leave me unless I tell her it is OK to go to bed without me.  If she is napping and I settle down on the couch she is immediately there to sleep with me.  I don't know how she hears the slightest sound but she does.

I am sure she understands so many sentences and if not she will cock her head and just listen intently trying to understand what I am saying.  She always looks very sympathetically if I am sad.  I often toy with the idea of getting a kitten but somehow I just can't make that decision.  But I am so glad Sadie is in my life.

Alas, her groomer's phone is not working anymore, what to do, where to go...a bad groomer around here is not guaranteed by any means.

Leah Graduates from Torrey Pines High

Now these pictures of Leah are much better.  She has the college name on the back of her hat.  She is off to BYU Hawaii!

Posing with her beautiful Mom.

And her handsome Dad.

And Mom and Dad!

And Grandparents Mary and Greg Carlston.

And Siblings Kelsi, Jimmy and Jacob.

Looks like a happy day!!  Congratulations to Leah!!!

Kelsi Graduates from Sixth Grade

So these are not very good pictures, taken from such a distance, but it is what was on Instagram today.  Hopefully a better one might get placed on there,  So Kelsi is off to Junior High next year!!!  The school she went to in Solana Beach was really a nice one.  I was so impressed every time I have been there.

Richard's Patriarchal Blessing

 I thought it was interesting that Richard was always of so much service to everyone and he enjoyed it and the second to last paragraph of his blessing addresses that very matter.  I scanned some things for Linda today and she asked me if I could scan them into my blog.  Yes, I can but I cannot make them a large as I would like.  So it may be hard to read. 

No More Itching!!!

Finally after six months of itching on the head, face, neck and upper chest, no more itching.  I had been on a steroid but it obviously did not solve the problem.  I went to my GP Dr. Salehi and asked her if she could get me in to the dermatologist in Chico earlier than August.  She immediately called and I had an appointment the next day!!!

Dear Maryanne drove me down, I get too stressed going to Chico alone, I just do not know the town well enough and I hate driving the windin canyon.  I so appreciate that she will go with me.  We ate at Chili's before coming back and had back ribs!

Anyone I saw Dr. Buttolph in the same office as Dr. Saejan as he had a cancellation.  He talked so fast and had an assistant on the tablet who wrote what he said and then they printed it out for me and gave me a list of recommended products.

So, yes, I do have eczema, it is the seborrheic dermatitis which is like a fungal infection -- dandruff.  He put me on two prescriptions: the topical steroid Clobetasal which is a solution I put on my scalp twice a day (just where it itches) and a prescription shampoo I use three times a week and wash my face and hair and he said when I wash my hair I should rinse it so it goes down the drain instead of on my shoulders and body.   He switched me to Zyrtec instead of Benadryl for the itching.   The redness has already started to go away.  So the dandruff shampoo and the other steroid did not work...wonder why.

But the steroid worked immediately and  I have not had to use the Zyrtec for itching at all.  After six months I think that is amazing!!!  We go back on July 9th.  Ha, I just noticed they have Robin Crockett on my instruction sheet as my name.  I better call them!!!

Oh, and the red skin syndrome...he says that is after years on steroids, not weeks.  So toss all the information away.

And and the Dr said rash from foods is not necessarily a part of this disease but if food makes you make out in a rash...stop eating it!!!  It is an individual thing...

They did give me a list of all the sensitive skin products than they recommend plus detergents to wash your clothes in....

Maria and Johnny's Neighborhood

Birdrock is so beautiful!

Seminary Graduation at Torrey Pines High

Here they are posing at the Hardy Home.

Dyno Dave

My nephew Dyno Dave is an expert on Dinosaurs and has tours at Makoshika State Park at Glendive, Montana.  Here he is showing a recent donation to their Museum.

Yikes--Withdrawal from Topical Steroids?

So the Derm gave me a topical synthetic steroid for my eczema...beware of using too prolonged and then stopping because it causes Red Skin Syndrome and you think your eczema is spreading.  You can get hives, rashes, and what looks like eczema and it continues on and on and gets worse and more itchy than what you began with!!!  And the doctors do not warn you.

There is actually a grass roots organization called ITSAN which addresses the problem and I am totally saturated with all there is to read about it.

And guess what foods make it worse--cow's milk, eggs, soy products, gluten, chocolate, nuts, fish and shellfish.

And which can help--apples, blueberries, cherries, broccoli, spinach, kale and probiotic foods like yogurt, sourdough bread, miso soup, naturally fermented pickles, soft cheese such as Gouda, sauerkraut, kefir, tempeh.

What else can trigger--high sugar foods like cakes, soda, some smoothies, fast food items like burgers.

I think the only things I have not given up by now is eggs!!

Sooooo what now...I am using the moisturizers, and oral antihistamine (Benadryl) and guess I need to change my laundry soap.  I do not suppose I can get rid of dog dander with Sadie around.  And do not wear clothes that irritate (stick with cotten).

So this affects the under 2's and the elderly the most and because our skin is so thin it is even worse, it gets inside the skin and causes problems.  You should not stop taking cold turkey? is a debate.

So not sure nuts caused the eczema but certainly makes it worse...so what did cause it, they do not know.  Curing it is even more of a guess but steroids in any form I think it is best to avoid or only use a little and not the over the counter ones either.  I used several Cortizone before I went to the Dr and got theTriamcinolene.

Anyway looking at the pictures of cases, mine is very mild...so far.

Yikes--Withdrawal from Topical Steroids?

So the Derm gave me a topical synthetic steroid for my eczema...beware of using too prolonged and then stopping because it causes Red Skin Syndrome and you think your eczema is spreading.  You can get hives, rashes, and what looks like eczema and it continues on and on and gets worse and more itchy than what you began with!!!  And the doctors do not warn you.

There is actually a grass roots organization called ITSAN which addresses the problem and I am totally saturated with all there is to read about it.

And guess what foods make it worse--cow's milk, eggs, soy products, gluten, chocolate, nuts, fish and shellfish.

And which can help--apples, blueberries, cherries, broccoli, spinach, kale and probiotic foods like yogurt, sourdough bread, miso soup, naturally fermented pickles, soft cheese such as Gouda, sauerkraut, kefir, tempeh.

What else can trigger--high sugar foods like cakes, soda, some smoothies, fast food items like burgers.

I think the only things I have not given up by now is eggs!!

Sooooo what now...I am using the moisturizers, and oral antihistamine (Benadryl) and guess I need to change my laundry soap.  I do not suppose I can get rid of dog dander with Sadie around.  And do not wear clothes that irritate (stick with cotten).

So this affects the under 2's and the elderly the most and because our skin is so thin it is even worse, it gets inside the skin and causes problems.  You should not stop taking cold turkey? is a debate.

So not sure nuts caused the eczema but certainly makes it worse...so what did cause it, they do not know.  Curing it is even more of a guess but steroids in any form I think it is best to avoid or only use a little and not the over the counter ones either.  I used several Cortizone before I went to the Dr and got theTriamcinolene.

Anyway looking at the pictures of cases, mine is very mild...so far.

Trevor Also Called on a Mission and Leaving in October

Trevor, the grandson of my friend Jean in our Clear Creek Branch, is leaving for a mission in Mexico in October.  The reason this is so interesting to me is Maryanne, a friend from Clear Creek Branch, had a granddaughter leaving the same month as Sarah, and now Jean, has a grandson leaving the same month as Jacob.  It's a small world, after all...

Stephanie Diede visits her Cousins Linda and Maria

Steph is the daughter of my sister Carole and our girls knew each other when they were toddlers and then later when Steph and her husband and children lived down in Escondido for a short time and then later the girls started getting together at the Anderson Cabin in Silvergate and visiting back and forth in Montana or down here.  I am happy they have stayed connected.

As ususal when Stephanie comes down, she and Maria have lots of fun.

Mitch Proposes!

Mitch and Bahia are engaged after a romantic serenading by Mitch to Bahia at the Beach!  Such a darling couple.

Jacob Receives His Mission Call

Jacob read his Mission Call Letter to a large group assembled at the Hardy Home.  He will be going to the Buenos Aires South Mission in Argentina!!!

Flowers Are Planted!!!

 We made our annual trek out to Martin's Nursery and bought a lot of flowers.  I did not get any of the hanging baskets this year.  Just filled my own and everything looks beautiful.  Wish the wind would stop blowing, seems to be more than usual this year.

We also went this to Walmart twice this week and got some garden soil and I put it on top of the mound in front and seeing if I can find enough catmint and white stuff to transplant and fill the whole hill--I have about half done!!

Eden Graduates from Preschool

So sweet and Nico joins in.

Well, she will be a beautiful Mermaid when she grows up!

Mom and Dad are so proud and so is Eden.

Is that the Peace sign?  Meagan is a beautiful Mommy.

Boots, Boots, Boots

Kristi sent me these pictures today.  She knows I love boots.  They are all ready with their jean jackets and boots for their annual trip to the Family Ranch in Wyoming.  I think they look darling.

Kate

Molly

Brynn

+Ryan

Charli is One Year Old

I missed the big party held at Linda's house for Charli.  Amy and Joe and Charli are now living in Carlsbad while looking for a home of their own.  Looks like Joe will be working on Pt Loma, have not heard all the details, but very exciting.  

In Bloom!!!

I can't believe it, this rhododendron has bloomed.  It has only happened once before in all the years I have been here.  The only thing I can think of that I may have done right is last year I bought all that red mulch and I just read that they will not bloom if they dry out and maybe for the first time they stayed with moisture cuz of all the mulch???!!!

And this was my crabapple tree before the wind blew all the blossoms off.

Nico and Eden on Scooter and Bike!

Meagan shared pictures of going to Balboa Park from her Dr's Office with Eden and Nico and their bicycle and scooter.  She said she had a hard time keeping up with them jogging!!!

Sister Carole

My sister Carole is spending two weeks in Utah with her best friend from her childhood and youth, Alyce.  Alyce joined the Church when she was living in Alaska and is now living in Provo where three of her children and their families live nearby.

Alyce and Carole Start a Two Week Vaca

Leah goes to the Prom

Is Allergy To Nuts My Problem?

Tonight I enjoyed a lot of pistachios as I watched TV.  Before I went to bed I treated my eczema, bumps on my skin, itchy eyes, itchy throat with claritin, systane, itch cream, and throat spray.  I have had an eczema problem practically the whole time I was in Del Mar and itchy eyes and itchy throat and itchy skin.  Since I came back I have been enjoying gluten free english muffins with peanut butter.  I had one this morning before I went to the Temple, I broke out in some bumps around my neck and was itching, not an unusual occurrence lately.

When I was in Del Mar I had bought the pistachios at Christmas time and kept them by my bed along with the peanut butter which I used a lot with apples.  Since I watched tv up there and spent a lot of time in my room I kept my snacks there.

Normally pistachios was a holiday treat but this year since they were so accessible at Whole Foods and Costco I was eating a lot of them.  Also since I was sharing a kitchen I think I ate more peanut butter than normal.  I also had almonds to snack on by my bedside.

I woke up itching tonight around 2 and begin to ask Siri a lot of questions about nut allergies.  Since I have seasonal allergies and other allergies I had never zeroed in on these but my eczema problem while I was in San Diego was enough to send me to the dermatologist and I have been treating it with a cream.  And the eyes and throat have been a problem as well as these bumps around the neck an etc. I never thought of nuts as a souce.

Since I am working in the yard it all seemed like environmental allergies but tonight I am very suspicious because of the increase in my nut consumption and my increase in these dermatitis and eye and throat itchiness.  As I read the symptoms of nut allergy plus the light headedness I attributed to benadryl.  Anyway there is also the immediate and four hour later reaction.  Somehow it is all coming together that this may be my problem.  It fits with the immediate reaction and then the four hour later.

So I am writing this down and from this day forward I am not eating the pistachios or peanut butter or almonds either although I have not eaten much of them since I returned.  I will check back here in a week and see if there has been a difference in all my itchiness, etc.  Because I have always had allergies I have never thought about the nuts but this increase in my nut usage and the increase in the eczema in particular and the eyes and throat and what I read tonight seems to make a lot of sense that this needs to be tested and the only way I know is to stop eating them....

Back Home in Lake Almanor, April 2018

Mitch and I arrived near to 8 PM on Thursday night the 28th.  Everything looks good!

Joe, my home teacher, turned on the water and hot water heater and the heat gauge needed a battery so Mitch put that in and the house was soon warm.

Mitch got everything raked up fairly easy and had some help on Saturday for a Susanville friend.  He has been meeting with old friends for a reunion and playing their music together.

Zac Visits Marilyn

This is Sherry's Zac and his children.  They visited Marilyn for a week and she really enjoyed getting to know them better.  His wife was taking the picture.

Time to Go Home and Things to Remember, April 2018

It has been time to go home for awhile but Mitch won't be able to go until this week so hopefully we will leave on Thursday or Friday so what have I been doing all this time?  Monica called and said there was snow on Thursday but it melted right away.  Christine, my neighbor, said the first really warm day was Friday.  Maryanne said it was 80 in Chico where she is staying with her Mom this week.

Totally frustrated on Friday when I go to Jiffy Lube.  I finished my gift card at Talbots and then go to Linda's to have the Charli show.  She is amazing, just enjoys whoever she is with, such a happy, fun baby.  I still have never seen her cry!!!  I should have taken her picture.  We should have done the 4 generation when Amy was there, too, I forget to take pictures.

 And then I go to Jiffy Lube.  He wants to put in $400 worth of work, then down to $200, finally got out of there for $100 but I am definitely looking for a different way to do my oil changes!!  Why did I not remember it needed doing when I was at Subaru last week?  They did a fantastic job of replacing the airbag on my car and washed the car and checked the tires.  But then I could not find the rental place to return the car---finally got there late and so Linda and I had to go to a different movie instead of the Imagines one Linda wanted to see.  We saw the one about Ted Kennedy and it was interesting to me because I never really got the true story when it happened but probably boring to Linda.  We met Maria for lunch and that was fun.  This Saturday we saw "I Feel Pretty" and it was good for all women to see.  We all need to have a feel good about ourselves and just enjoy life instead of stressing ourselves out over our looks.  We ate at the Smokeyard and I had the ribs again.  After Maria's foot was tired and she went home.  She turned her foot when walking and it is still not healed.  Linda and I went to Macys and Linda bought me a new raincoat for Mother's Day!!!!  I have two but they are both so big now.  I hope I do not gain weight.  I really feel so good with the weight off, but...

I myself have enjoyed Yogurtland too many times and have had too many Dr Peppers and I am getting a muffin top again...also need to do more exercising.  Except for my walks with the dogs in the morning and afternoon, that is it.  My weight has stayed the same but...

I have been reviewing the notebooks I brought to see what emails from the past I should throw away and which I should put in my memoirs and I found when I lost that first 20 lbs of my weight loss.  It was after I moved to Lake Almanor and the RS president had just lost 20 lbs doing the Atkins diet and so I did it, too.  It worked.  I lost the 20 pounds and it was so easy.  One thing I loved was my sugarless jello.  Yesterday when I ate at Linda's on Sunday she made some but also adds Collagen protein.  I liked that Idea and think I will start it when I go home.

I found in the 2000 notebook all the many emails that Carla and I had catching up on 50 years and I do want to read them all again before I toss them.  I know Carla would not like me printing them anywhere or keeping them around.  They were for my eyes only and I still have them!!!

I have enjoyed the haircut that Ceira gave me but I did not have another one and will be happy to use Cheryl when I return.  I think she does a good job, too.  But I really like the Living Proof mousse and rootlifter Ceira told me about.  I get it from Amazon, it is very expensive but you use very little.  Will be interesting to see how long it lasts.  I can blow out my hair quite easily with it and it dries faster than the gel I have been using.  The secret is to dry the hair almost and then put the mousse on and comb it through.  Then spray the rootlifter on.  She had me get a different brush, too, which I like.

I have been skipping out on the last  one to two hours of church (it kills my back to sit on those benches that long anyway) and going home, changing my clothes and going to Linda's for dinner at 2:30.  They cook their meat on the barbeque and roast their veggies and do not bother with bread so I have really enjoyed the steak and pork tenderloin and occcasional mashed potatoes.  I must remember to do the pork tenderloin on Sundays.  Gary said to brown it good first and then pop it in a 350 oven for 20 to 25 minutes.  So yummy.  I should buy steak occasionally, too.  I would just slice it and panfry really fast.  I was reading that the main thing about red meat is to buy the grassfed--same with hamburger, too.

Had a frustrating time with Macys American Express.  I need to listen better.  I did not know Macys was giving me a new card (which I never received).  They moved my charges over on to it and then I never received the card or bill until it was two months late and I had a horrible experience talking to the credit place. I later learned they have their credit outsourced to the Philippines and there have been other unhappy people, not just me.  So after letters and calls I have finally been credited back all the late charges and fees and supposedly have a $29 credit on that card---which I still have never received.  As soon as I get it I will cancel it.

I was called in to have imaging on my carotid arteries.  But here again, very poor office work as they tried to make the appointment at the Encinitas Scripps.  Finally after a week of calls the Vista office called and tried to make the appointment.  They were surprised to find they were called but immediately put me on the line with Scripps Encinitas and they handled the call very well and I had the appointment, all very professional. But why did the Vista office get called???? Now after a week of trying to get the report from Dr. Hemp, I still do not have it.  His office is most frustrating.  I guess I will just assume that no news is good news and not try and get the report anymore.  I assume in time, if it is bad, they will get in touch with me.  Very poor office work.

I have been very depressed and stressed about my financial situation but I really enjoyed a talk I heard on BYU channel.  I know how I need to think and I let myself get filled with fear and forget.  About selling the house...still unsure since it takes almost 50% of monies needed to do a Reverse Mortgage Purchase and the rentals are so high and James may not be living in this house and I will not have the apartment to live in...I really need to think about it and think about it and review my options.  I am very safe up there, it is just a problem for a short time in the winter.  I do have fulltime neighbors now and they have offered to be there for me.  Marilyn is having a granddaughter move in so I will not go there.  James is uncertain about their future and it is not good for me to live so long with anyone anyway.  I am healthy and I just need to stay that way and continue to eat well and better and do more walking and exercising and more positive thinking and not let myself get so depressed.  I have so many projects I can work on.  I should get more involved.  I should enjoy the outdoors more.  I should just enjoy that wonderful area.  I have loved the time I can spend with the children but I have too much time doing nothing worthwhile at all.  I need to enjoy life more doing, being, feeling...  It is too expensive down here...

Time to Go Home and Things to Remember

It has been time to go home for awhile but Mitch won't be able to go until this week so hopefully we will leave on Thursday or Friday so what have I been doing all this time?  Monica called and said there was snow on Thursday but it melted right away.  Christine, my neighbor, said the first really warm day was Friday.  Maryanne said it was 80 in Chico where she is staying with her Mom this week.

Totally frustrated on Friday when I go to Jiffy Lube.  I finished my gift card at Talbots and then go to Linda's to have the Charli show.  She is amazing, just enjoys whoever she is with, such a happy, fun baby.  I still have never seen her cry!!!  I should have taken her picture.  We should have done the 4 generation when Amy was there, too, I forget to take pictures.

 And then I go to Jiffy Lube.  He wants to put in $400 worth of work, then down to $200, finally got out of there for $100 but I am definitely looking for a different way to do my oil changes!!  Why did I not remember it needed doing when I was at Subaru last week?  They did a fantastic job of replacing the airbag on my car and washed the car and checked the tires.  But then I could not find the rental place to return the car---finally got there late and so Linda and I had to go to a different movie instead of the Imagines one Linda wanted to see.  We saw the one about Ted Kennedy and it was interesting to me because I never really got the true story when it happened but probably boring to Linda.  We met Maria for lunch and that was fun.  This Saturday we saw "I Feel Pretty" and it was good for all women to see.  We all need to have a feel good about ourselves and just enjoy life instead of stressing ourselves out over our looks.  We ate at the Smokeyard and I had the ribs again.  After Maria's foot was tired and she went home.  She turned her foot when walking and it is still not healed.  Linda and I went to Macys and Linda bought me a new raincoat for Mother's Day!!!!  I have two but they are both so big now.  I hope I do not gain weight.  I really feel so good with the weight off, but...

I myself have enjoyed Yogurtland too many times and have had too many Dr Peppers and I am getting a muffin top again...also need to do more exercising.  Except for my walks with the dogs in the morning and afternoon, that is it.  My weight has stayed the same but...

I have been reviewing the notebooks I brought to see what emails from the past I should throw away and which I should put in my memoirs and I found when I lost that first 20 lbs of my weight loss.  It was after I moved to Lake Almanor and the RS president had just lost 20 lbs doing the Atkins diet and so I did it, too.  It worked.  I lost the 20 pounds and it was so easy.  One thing I loved was my sugarless jello.  Yesterday when I ate at Linda's on Sunday she made some but also adds Collagen protein.  I liked that Idea and think I will start it when I go home.

I found in the 2000 notebook all the many emails that Carla and I had catching up on 50 years and I do want to read them all again before I toss them.  I know Carla would not like me printing them anywhere or keeping them around.  They were for my eyes only and I still have them!!!

I have enjoyed the haircut that Ceira gave me but I did not have another one and will be happy to use Cheryl when I return.  I think she does a good job, too.  But I really like the Living Proof mousse and rootlifter Ceira told me about.  I get it from Amazon, it is very expensive but you use very little.  Will be interesting to see how long it lasts.  I can blow out my hair quite easily with it and it dries faster than the gel I have been using.  The secret is to dry the hair almost and then put the mousse on and comb it through.  Then spray the rootlifter on.  She had me get a different brush, too, which I like.

I have been skipping out on the last  one to two hours of church (it kills my back to sit on those benches that long anyway) and going home, changing my clothes and going to Linda's for dinner at 2:30.  They cook their meat on the barbeque and roast their veggies and do not bother with bread so I have really enjoyed the steak and pork tenderloin and occcasional mashed potatoes.  I must remember to do the pork tenderloin on Sundays.  Gary said to brown it good first and then pop it in a 350 overn for 20 to 25 minutes.  So yummy.  I should buy steak occasionally, too.  I would just slice it and panfry really fast.  I was reading that the main thing about red meat is to buy the grassfed--same with hamburger, too.

Had a frustrating time with Macys American Express.  I need to listen better.  I did not know Macys was giving me a new card (which I never received).  They moved my charges over on to it and then I never received the card or bill until it was two months late and I had a horrible experience talking to the credit place. I later learned they have their credit outsourced to the Philippines and there have been other unhappy people, not just me.  So after letters and calls I have finally been credited back all the late charges and fees and supposedly have a $29 credit on that card---which I still have never received.  As soon as I get it I will cancel it.

I was called in to have imaging on my carotid arteries.  But here again, very poor office work as they tried to make the appointment at the Encinitas Scripps.  Finally after a week of calls the Vista office called and tried to make the appointment.  They were surprised to find they were called but immediately put me on the line with Scripps Encinitas and they handled the call very well and I had the appointment, all very professional. But why did the Vista office get called???? Now after a week of trying to get the report from Dr. Hemp, I still do not have it.  His office is most frustrating.  I guess I will just assume that no news is good news and not try and get the report anymore.  I assume in time, if it is bad, they will get in touch with me.  Very poor office work.

I have been very depressed and stressed about my financial situation but I really enjoyed a talk I heard on BYU channel.  I know how I need to think and I let myself get filled with fear and forget.  About selling the house...still unsure since it takes almost 50% of monies needed to do a Reverse Mortgage Purchase and the rentals are so high and James may not be living in this house and I will not have the apartment to live in...I really need to think about it and think about it and review my options.  I am very safe up there, it is just a problem for a short time in the winter.  I do have fulltime neighbors now and they have offered to be there for me.  Marilyn is having a granddaughter move in so I will not go there.  James is uncertain about their future and it is not good for me to live so long with anyone anyway.  I am healthy and I just need to stay that way and continue to eat well and better and do more walking and exercising and more positive thinking and not let myself get so depressed.  I have so many projects I can work on.  I should get more involved.  I should enjoy the outdoors more.  I should just enjoy that wonderful area.  I have loved the time I can spend with the children but I have too much time doing nothing worthwhile at all.  I need to enjoy life more doing, being, feeling...  It is too expensive down here...