Tender Mercy...

Was on me tonight. I wasn't thinking well, very tired but I hadn't shopped for two weeks and tomorrow is another 10 hr day and I had no lunch food, etc. so I felt terrible being one of those Sunday shoppers at Wal Mart, but there I was.

After I left, I missed my turn on Galleria and ended up in Rocklin and had to swing back so it was about 30 minutes before I arrived home and then I realized I didn't have my billfold!!! I must have left it in the cart when I unloaded. Would anyone actually find it and turn it in???

I hurried back and looked in the cart holder where I had put mine, not there, all the time saying silent prayers and thinking how was I going to cancel all those cards before someone had a buying spree. I had my cards, which I seldom use, the government card, my debit card with all my savings--over $50,000 total in chargable cards... plus about $100 in cash. Would anyone turn that in???

As I was waiting for a clerk in customer service I was trying to imagine what I would do if she said it wasn't there...who would I call first, what would they do to me for losing a government card, why do I carry all that in my billfold with my drivers license, SS card. It is stupid. I seldom use any but my gas card and debit card for grocercies and cash. Why do I carry them all together?

Finally it was my turn. She said, "Yes, I do think someone turned one in a little while ago. We have it locked up. Let me ask my supervisor." Her supervisor comes back WITH THE BILLFOLD! She said, "You know, our customers are so good. We get lots of billfolds turned in. Most people think that no one will turn them in but they do."

Sort of makes you feel good about mankind doesn't it and...tender mercies of the Lord, taking care of me.

Oh, and all that cash was still there...

Life as I know It

What is my life today? Helping victims of hurricanes get the monies they need to repair their damaged homes and damaged lives...

The time goes so fast at the office, it is hard to believe I am working 10 hours a day now--from 7 am to 5:30 pm (we are usually there early to check our business emails and set up the computer with the programs we want on call). Believe it or not they chose some select ones who are "producing well" to work longer hours and I was amongst them (surprisingly).

First thing is to check and see how many files you have in your Que. This is usually 15 or so. Those who are the "oldest" need to be worked on first. Most of my old files have been from Hurricane Gustav. More and more are from Hurricane Ike every day. Ideally you will complete a file every two hours. This means you will have made a loan decision of Approval, Denial, or Withdrawal and then zapped it (through the computer program) to your supervisor. If you did well, he will send it on to legal where they check for errors and then letters and documents or letters of denial are sent to the hurricane victim. If they are denied, they may be referred back to FEMA for help. This seems like adequate time but...

The aim is to be thorough, just, compassionate, knowledgable, compliant with the SOP (standard operating system) and complete the file before the clock runs out. All files are to be finished from application by victim, to verification of damage by the appraiser, to approving or denying in less than 14 days. By the time it shows up in my que it may already be 12 or 13 days old.

My job is to make the decision from all the financial and appraisal information (that has been fed into the system), communiating with the insurance company, seeking online for ownership of the property, checking FEMA records for distributions by them, checking their credit, talking to the applicant and eventually communicating to the applicant a decision they are hopefully happy to hear. It sometimes takes more than one phone call to complete this.

The hardest part is doing this all with a paperless file--reading everything from the screen, not being able to lay the credit report out in front of you, etc. Learning how the program works is still a challenge. You not only have to conquer the computer program, you have to know the rules of lending, etc. We have thick books and memorandums and fortunately supervisors to help.

The good thing is the very nice working conditions we have. Great chairs, desks, large computer screens, large desk space. The building is very lovely and is the same one I worked in all through Charley, Jeanne and Ivan.

And we come home to a great homecooked meal at the Homewood Suites and get sent off with good breakfasts. The Marriott Residence Inn people don't have quite the good meals we do.

My BIGGEST problem is falling asleep too early and then waking up too early, how do I break this cycle????

I just read that one of the reasons we gain weight is if we are sleeping 6 hrs or less--wow, that is me!

As I have written this it has just occurred to me that two hours should be more than adequate time--I have been doing 3-4 a day--I have to do better, I just have to get more efficient, more focused, and less frustrated with waiting for the computer to do it's thing--and never have to look twice at the same thing, that is the trick. Do it once and do it right...make notes you can read...onward and upward...

"About Me" on a Sleepless Night

ABOUT ME: Janet--

1. I AM: alone most of the time
2. I WANT: more joy and security in my life
3. I HAVE: a wonderful family whom I love so very much
4. I WISH: deep love for all my children and grandchildren
5. I HATE: listening to pompous men talk
6. I MISS: Richard and Bandido
7. I FEAR: being poor and alone
8. I HEAR: less clearly than I used to
9. I SEARCH: for joy, peace and security
10. I WONDER: if I'll ever be what the Lord intended me to be
11. I REGRET: not being more careful what and how much I eat
12. I LOVE: music that makes me feel romantic
13. I FORGIVE: everyone whoever made me feel sad
14. I ACHE: all over my body too often
15. I ALWAYS: eat too fast
16. I TRY: to do my best most of the time
17. I AM NOT: finished yet
18. I SEEM: unfriendly and aloof much of the time
19. I KNOW: that God lives and wants us to have joy in our life
20. I FEEL: very alone much of the time
21. I DREAM: I am lost or my things are lost alot
22. I GIVE: thanks everyday for all the blessings I have
23. I LISTEN: to the scriptures and my music every day
24. I LAUGH: not as much as I would like, I need a good laugh a day
25. I CAN'T: make myself exercise or walk enough
26. I WRITE: very boring stuff
27. I CRY: very seldom
28. I SLEEP: for six hours and that is it, no matter I am still tired
29. I AM NOT ALWAYS: able to focus on what I am hearing
30. I SEE: less well than I used to
31. I LOSE: everything but weight
32. I CONFUSE: easily, more than I should admit
33. I NEED: more joy in my life
34. I SHOULD: enjoy being with people more
35. I SING: seldom at all anymore--I used to love to sing...hmmm
36. I DANCE: around the floor for 20 min in the am, my only exercise...

Hey, I Am Getting It...

Today I had my first performance review from the SLO I had from 9/22-10/3. The first week here was just training and then we started processing. I thought I was doing so badly but he actually gave me a really great review (I shouldn't have complained about him) and said I was in one of the top 3 in points (production) even though none of us are up to what they want from us...everyone must be struggling.

I am finally catching on to the program and quite enjoying it. Plus I am right next to my really great new SLO who is extremely forthcoming with advice and hints on what they want and right across from me is a computer guru who always knows how to do what if I get stuck so a pretty good situation right now.

Today "The Duchess" started at a theater here so I ran over after work and quite enjoyed it. Kara Knightly is great in it and it is historical fiction, which I always love, from the book "Georgeana, the Devonshire Duchess" or something like that, based on truth. Quite an interesting story and well done I think. A sad tale of having to live your life according to what is expected of you. Hey, isn't that the life we all live?? Of course, women didn't have it so well back in the 1700's, we have a pretty great world right now, even with all it's problems.

Twice this week I set the timer so I could watch TV from 9 to 10 and believe it or not I didn't see one minute of the shows either night. I am so tired I fall asleep as soon as I close my eyes, problem is then I awake at 2-2:30 so that is a problem! Also the eating too much and exercising too little. Hopefully when I am more relaxed about what I am doing, that will change.

Have you noticed?

It's been a long time since I went to "In and Out" and I was shocked to see the size of the cheeseburger and shake I was served this week. They are about half the size they were in the 90's.

Then one day when I took the wrong road looking for a Jiffy Lube I ran into a Dairy Queen. Remember the Blizzards we used to buy at the DQ next to Choice Mortgage on Genesee? Half that size now!!

I must agree I shouldn't have been buying either one and I doubt I will again.

I walked into Macy's last week to buy some facial cream and I had to pass a lot of clothes on the way. Ugly colors, ugly styles, ugly prints, ugh. Then a few day ago I walked through Nordstrom's Rack. Ugly colors, ugly styles, ugly prints, ugh. Tonight I walked through Marshall's to look at the fun things in the back and I had to pass a lot of clothes on the way. Ugly colors, ugly styles, ugly prints, Ugh. Are the styles and colors just reflecting the depressing economy we are in??? Wow, take a look and see if you see any happy colors and styles out there...

Learning Curve is UP!!!

I am so glad Maria brought Mitch down last weekend. It surely cheered me up! Maria has such a great way with words, in voice, as well as on writing. I know we all enjoy reading her sobering messages that teach us each day. Thank you, Maria, for all your insight and beautiful way of voicing it.

I had never eaten a dinner at the Cheese Factory and I had the Bang Bang Chicken and Shrimp. It was so delicious. There is a Cheese Factory a block from my hotel and I bet it is not as crowded as the Arden mall one, we will have to try it sometime. We had planned on going to a movie but Michael got sick, so Michael and I hope to catch it this weekend.

I cannot go away overnight without checking out and back in the hotel (company rule) so if I go home for my winter clothes it will have to be on a quick run on a Sunday!! I really like my room and location of room and if I am going to be here till Christmas I want to keep this room.

We haven't started working 10 hrs yet and I am already so tired...

I finally feel like I am "getting" the computerized paperless loan processing program we are learning. Today I had a very productive day and feel like I have had a breakthrough. Maybe now I can stop doing this nervous eating.

The fact that I have a new SLO has certainly helped. He is the nice car partner who toured us around Dallas and kindly went with Betsy and I to dinner a lot. He is a team player, non judgmental, teaching without intimidation, kind of leader and we are all doing better under his tutelage. He acted happy to have me sitting next to him again also cuz he says I am the most organized person he has ever seen and probably thinks I can be of help to him once in awhile, too. We both miss the Necco Wafers I ran out of cuz Wal Mart doesn't have anymore!

He is about the age of my John. Just a really nice person. Comes from Buffalo. Our other SLO was knowledgeable but intimidating with sarcasm. I thought I was the only one who thought he didn't like me but Suzanne said the same thing today. We are both doing better with John. (He is a John E also). I don't understand why all leaders don't understand that a positive and comfortable working environment has positive results.

Now if my eye would just stop twitching, we are all having trouble with our eyes--could it be the lights, the computers, the???????

It's All Relative

Last night someone sent me an Obituary Archive from my hometown. I was interested in reading about the lady I worked for one summer during college.

It was a drive in--and I worked inside and my sister worked outside. The couple that ran the restaurant had recently married--second marriages for both I assume. They were always being kind of romantic and I thought it was so weird because they were so old!!!

Now as I read her obituary I find that she could have only been 43 at the time--that is younger than my daughters are and they seem so very young!!

And when I was in grade school my mother was in her early forties and I thought she seemed so old. Oh, my goodness. I guess it is good we feel that way or we wouldn't have respected them as much as we did but it is so hard to believe in retrospect.