Father's Day Talk by Linda, 2018

Linda did not have time to give all of this talk at her ward, but that is the nice thing about typing it out is that you can preserve what you wrote.   I like saving these and want to find how I can get scanned talks on here without retyping them.  I have many saved talks of family and relatives that I want saved and reread by others because their thoughts are important to pass on.  My blog is like a journal to me that I can go back and read whenever I want to remember a memory.  Thanks for sending Linda.  Memories are forever.  Love it.

Fathers,

I was asked to talk about fathers and the plan of salvation. It’s been a joy to ponder the life and example of my own father that passed away over twenty years ago. His father passed away when he was just eleven. He was the youngest of 3 brothers and his mother worked very hard to raise 3 boys alone. Money was scarce and life was hard. I think that at some point in my father's life he made a decision that his own children would never have to experience the same hardships he did.

You would never see my dad on a golf course. He worked long hours, but was never too busy to drop whatever he was doing when someone was in need. He owned his own business and often hired people not because they would be an asset to him and his company but because he could provide an opportunity to train and give them some skills they couldn’t get somewhere else. I remember one young man that he hired, who had no desirable work skills. But my father gave him a car to drive and simple tasks and errands that he could perform. This young man wasn’t very responsible and at one point he even stole some tools from my dad. But, my father never got angry or talked poorly about him, and he didn’t let him go, he knew he was a troubled youth without a father or anyone to guide him, and he saw a chance for him to make a difference in someone’s life. 

On vacations, all his attention went to making sure we were having a good time.   Later in life, I remember someone asking my Father what his worst vacation was, and he related this month-long camping trip that he and my mother had planned, driving from San Diego to Montana with camping equipment strapped to the top of the family station wagon, stopping to visit extended family, picking up cousins along the way to join in our adventure. Of course, I was stunned and a little heartbroken, that this vacation wasn’t as wonderful for him as it was for me. I had nothing but wonderful memories of us driving, singing and giggling as a family, Dad setting up the campsite, mom cooking the meals. Even stopping at the laundry mat and sitting out front with an ice cream cone were happy memories for me. Now, of course, as a parent, I can see why this might not have been his favorite vacation. But it was never about him it was always about us having a good time.

My father was not one to discipline, he taught us by example and expected us to do the right thing. I can only remember one time that I really knew my father was disappointed in me. I was a teenager, it was a Saturday night, I was getting ready for the church dance. Since I had a car to drive, it wasn’t unusual to get calls from other kids asking for a ride to the dance. On this particular Saturday night, I got a call from someone I didn’t want to particularly ride with, so I made up an excuse why I wouldn’t be able to drive them. As soon as I got off the phone, my father appeared around the corner and let me know very sternly, that as long as I was living in his house, driving his car, with his gas money I would give this person and anyone else that called a ride to the dance. I got the message and never forgot it.

I can picture our own Father in Heaven looking down from above thinking the same thing….Everything we have is a gift from God and is largely unmerited, I can imagine his disappointment when what little He asks in return seems like too much. I can only imagine the love of our Heavenly Father as I contemplate the love I have for my own children. We may be disappointed at times, but there is nothing more powerful than the love of a parent. Our Heavenly Father is always there, watching, guiding, hoping that we choose to recognize his watching and protective care over us.

In Primary, we sing  a beautiful song about our Heavenly Fathers Plan for us:

I lived in heaven a long time ago, it is true;

Lived there and loved there with people I know. So did you.

Then Heavenly Father presented a beautiful plan,

All about earth and eternal salvation for man.

Father said he needed someone who had enough love,

To give his life so we all could return there above,

There was another who sought for the honor divine.

Jesus said, “Father, send me, and the glory be thine.”

Jesus was chosen, and as the Messiah, he came,

Conquering evil and death through his glorious name,

Giving us hope of a wonderful life yet to be

Home in that heaven where Father is waiting for me.

I love that the gospel is so simple that a Primary child can understand it, yet so deep that we can never stop learning.

Growing up, the Plan of Salvation, or Plan of Happiness as we call it, looked like a wonderful gift, perfectly wrapped. How wonderful, that our Heavenly Father loved us so much, that he created this beautiful earth, gave us bodies to master, families to love us, prophets to guide us, scriptures to help us remember, priesthood ordinances to bind us to Him and Savior to save us from all our weakness so that we could indeed live with our Father in Heaven again. After some life experience, this perfect plan looks more like a puzzle with lots of pieces. I can see the picture on the box and I have faith that all these pieces will come together someday if I just keep working on it. Some pieces fit together beautifully. Some pieces look like they fit, but they don’t. Some pieces look like they belong in a different box. Despite our best intentions and inner confidence, we look at pieces of the puzzle and ask ourselves “What is this for? Or How does this fit?” But it’s ok, our growth in this life comes from working on the puzzle, and having faith and joy in the process of bringing it together.

Perhaps your own story looks more like a broken puzzle than a neatly wrapped package. Maybe the fathers in your life were absent physically or emotionally and you've had to do some personal work exercising forgiveness, patience, and a new perspective.

One of the things I enjoyed about serving down at MCRD was hearing the stories of these young men when they first show up as 18 and 19-year-old boys scared to death with a drill sergeant breaking down every ounce of pride and confidence they once had. It was very common to hear stories of absent fathers and lack of a mentor and or role model to guide these young men in their formative years. It was humbling to watch these young men transform under the discipline and commandry of the Marines along with the ministering and mentoring of good priesthood leaders leading them back to God and the gospel of Jesus Christ. It was joyful to watch as these young men accepted God in their life, graduated with a new perspective and confidence in themselves as men and future husbands and fathers, with the gospel to lead them into a bright future.

Fortunately, our Heavenly Father has given us wonderful instructions for structuring our lives and putting together our best selves. Those instructions work regardless of our age or circumstance. He has given us the gospel of Jesus Christ.  He has given us the Plan of Salvation, even the Plan of Happiness. He has not left us alone with all the uncertainties or challenges of life, saying, “Here you go. Good luck. Figure it out.”

If we will only be patient and look with a humble heart and an open mind, we will find that God has given us many tools to better understand His comprehensive instructions for our happiness in life:

·        He has given us the priceless gift of the Holy Ghost,

·        He has given us modern-day apostles and prophets,
·        He has restored His Church— and the authority to bind or seal on earth and in heaven.
·        He has given us the holy scriptures—His written word to us.

Heavenly Father has given us this support because He loves us. He said of Himself, “This is My work and My glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”

This does not mean, however, that our lives will be without paradoxes, heartbreak and opposition. In the scriptures, we read: “It must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things”. Agency and obedience, for example, are two foundation principles that are in tension with each other. It is in the struggle to be obedient while maintaining integrity, to have faith while being true to reason and evidence, to serve and love in spite of imperfections and even offenses that teach us how to act and not merely be acted upon as we allow divine power to enter our lives in transforming ways. While our Heavenly Father’s plan may be perfect, the work we do in this life is not. Perhaps it is the work that we do during times of conflict, opposition, and brokenness that we allow ourselves to be humble enough to seek the Lord's help in acquiring divinely needed gifts such as patience, compassion, mercy, and forgiveness.

We can learn much from Book of Mormon fathers as they strived to teach their children the gospel. Lehi sent his sons back to Jerusalem to get the brass plates or the “words of their fathers.” He knew how important the words of their fathers would be to future generations, exhorting “them with all the feeling of a tender parent that they would hearken to his words”.  Book of Mormon fathers constantly reminded their sons of saving truths and bore their testimonies to their sons. King Benjamin counseled “Remember that these sayings are true, and also that these records are true, I would that ye should search them diligently, that ye may profit thereby.” Alma bore witness to his son Helaman saying “I do know, and the knowledge which I have is of God”. Helaman’s talk with his sons produces one of the most memorable verses of the Book of Mormon “And now, my sons, remember, remember, that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation.”

These Book of Mormon fathers knew that their children needed to know the scriptures, they needed to know the plan of salvation, they needed to know about the atonement, the resurrection, judgment and eternal life.

As I pondered the example of my own pioneer ancestors, their lives were a testimony of their love for God, the Book of Mormon and the restoration of the gospel. I feel blessed that I have a quite lengthy letter from my great-grandfather to his son. In the letter he related the life of his father. So, this is a letter from a father to a son, about his grandfather. Who was my great, great-grandfather?  Sylvester Earl, who, at 21, accepted the gospel in Far West Missouri, where the Saints were gathering. He was ordained an Elder by Hyrum Smith and received a blessing from Joseph Smith before he left on his mission, that his tongue would be loosed…and that he would bring many souls to the knowledge of the truth. He wrote of many of their troubles and hardships as they traveled from Nauvoo across the plains to Salt Lake, and then of his call to help settle Utah’s Dixie. They finally settled in Pine Valley where he lived until his death years later, but before he passed away he lay unconscious for 36 hours and then awoke and called his wife, his brother and his son to his bedside and slowly related what had happened while his body lay in unconsciousness. “I have been to the world of spirits, I have seen the Prophet Joseph and his brother Hyrum, they are very busy men. I saw many others that I knew. I walked the streets of their beautiful cites and saw many people. I wish to leave my dying testimony that we are not deceived, that my family is not deceived. This is the work of the Lord that we have embraced. Joseph Smith is one of the mightiest prophets that ever graced this earth. Brigham Young is the right man to lead this People.” the letter continues and then again ends with the father's testimony to his son. What greater gift can a father leave his posterity than the testimony of his faith in Jesus Christ, the plan of salvation, the atonement, resurrection, and eternal life.

In closing, since I’m the one speaking, I get to give a shout out to the father of my own children. The love that my children have for their father now is a testament to the kind of dad he was and is. It never mattered what Gary was doing, he always wanted his children by his side. Whether he was working around the house, serving in the church, running to the store, or having fun with his toys, he wanted his children right there next to him. They were opportunities for him to teach by example and show them that he loved them. When we once asked our children why they weren’t more disobedient, one said: “I didn’t want to disappoint dad, I knew how much it would upset him.” 

They have happy memories of their dad going on their scout trips and visiting girls camp, a few of them commented that “he was the cool dad, everyone wished they had.” Another said, “I loved when dad would do trivia with us while driving in the car, he is sooo smart!" Sarah, our missionary said,  “He is my inspiration out here for being sweetly bold with our investigators. Dad always knows how to tell people how to get work done, or do the right thing with power, but at the same time just being super motivating with love.”