Books and Videos and Life

The power was out at the church today so I spent the day watching the Joseph Smith Papers on the BYU Channel.  It is so amazingly done, the research, the collaboration, the result which is not at all completed but will eventually be about 20 books and is already two seasons of very interesting videos and a very well done web site.  Today I also learned about a big donor to the papers Larry H. Miller.  

He is the owner of the JAZZ among other things but started out working in the maintenance department of a car dealer and ended up owning about 47 Toyota dealerships plus so many more companies in so many different areas.  How does one person become so successful?  We all have the same amount of hours in the day.  He passed away in 2009 but what a legacy he left.  He was also an avid reader of books and history and was so fascinated about the JS Papers project that he was very generous in his support.

The Papers are mainly for scholars which made me wonder how one gets to be a scholar.  Do they have higher IQs to begin with or just apply themselves more in study and schooling and degrees??? Why don't I accomplish more and know more???  Life is such a puzzle.

The other book I have been listening to is Meredith Baxter's life story "Untied".  What is sad to learn is how such a successful and talented actress could have such low self-worth and be so emotionally abused in her 16 year marriage.  She said she is very open about it because she wants other women who are in such relationships to learn from her and not live in a marriage where they have no voice and are mentally and emotionally and physically abused.  Her husband David Birney was a narcissist. She came from a home where she felt no self-worth or love.  What a life she lived and how quiet she was about it for most of her life.  She then went on to have another failed marriage and had had a failed marriage right out of high school as well.  She came out about her successful lesbian relationship in 2009.  I must say it is a very well-written book and she reads it herself which makes it even better.  Her life is really a puzzle but what a beautiful, talented person in spite of it all.  She has five children as well and survived cancer.

Today was so perfect outside, not too hot, not too cool, just perfect.  I am anxiously awaiting for more lilies to bloom, but they are in so much shade...

Day of Movies and Books

I had never read any of David Baldacci books so I chose to read some reviews before I downloaded "One Summer" as a audio on my computer.  It was interesting that  many of the reviews from his fans did not like this book.  It is evidently a big departure from his other best sellers.  However, the ones who did like it, really loved it.  And that is the way I felt about it.  It was like the Nicholas Sparks books.  The author said it was a book that he had been wanting to write for a long time.  I had a good cry in the last part and you became very frustrated at how the legal system works against families, rather than for them much of the time and how we all have difficulty with relationships and communication and how unfair life is sometimes no matter how well you do your part.  Anyway I fell asleep last night and it played to the end and I slept through it all but it was easy to find where I dosed off and hear it all early this morning.  And I am happy to find another author who really knows how to write.  Especially his love letters!!!

Maryanne and I had an fun time watching "White House Down" yesterday.  What an exciting movie and how well Channing Tatum looks!

Then during the witching hours (what I used to call 5 to 7 when the children were little) I really enjoyed a TCM oldie "Devotion".  It was the story of the Bronte sisters when they were writing "Wuthering Heights" and "Jane Eyre".  What a great movie.  Osborne told the story of how it was kept on the shelves for 3 years after it was made as punishment to Olivia De Havilland because she was trying to leave the studio.  Actually eventually she was successful at that and then she won the Academy Award for the picture she made elsewhere.  Then they released "Devotion" and rode success on the coattails of that other movie.  I recorded it originally because Ida Lupino was in it and she is a favorite of mine. 

Anyway it was a day of movies and books and a good thing, too, because I was soooo tired.  Today I must make bread before it gets too hot, I am almost out and tomorrow is the 4th.  Haven't decided whether I want to go into the parade and craft fair.  Maybe Matt will be here.  It did rain last evening so the heat spell is broken.  Good day!

Netflix

Netflix continues to entertain me.  I just watched a corny movie 'Lucy Gallant' from the late 40's or early 50's when Charlton Heston wore his pants too high and Hollywood did not know how to do hair.  But they surely had high fashion then.  Loved the clothes.  The story line was pretty corny, too. with the "women need to stay at home", blah, blah, blah   Of, course, it wouldn't have looked corny to me then.  Time has changed us all.

A very interesting movie was "The Proposition" about a time before artificial insemination and a woman who wanted her own baby and her rich husband was sterile.  Quite a mixed up story but well done.  The star was the Grayson beauty on "Revenge".  Loved the clothes in this movie, too, especially the nightgowns.

Netflix continues to be what keeps me awake at night.

I spent the afternoon delving into the new Family Search and it is amazing  what you can do on the internet and the records you can find.  I looked at the 1940 Census when we were living on Hughes Street in Glendive.  I was in first grade and we moved that summer to the house on the Heights.  You can actually save the copy of the document in your own Document Folder in Family Tree.

Sadie was a real scamp today.  I need to get her more tired with more exercise and running!!!!

Netflix Rules!

I am keeping busy with running errands and walking dogs and eating plus a lot of watching Netflix.  I finished the series "Upstairs, Downstairs", "Doc Martin" as well as some choice movies.  Currently I am really enjoying "House of Cards". 

Saturday I met Maria at El Callehon in Encinitas for some really delicious Mexican food.  I have mostly been eating fish tacos but that night I had pork tostados.  The pork was so good.  They also make their own chips and salsa and we had to have refills.  It was funny when we met at the restaurant.  I thought I was in the wrong place (I was parked so I could not see the restaurant).  I called Maria and she directed me.  I left the parking lot, drove a half block and turned around and then had to turn around again and I ended up in exactly the same place I was before except this time I saw Maria standing in front of the restaurant.  Duuuh, I am such a looney sometimes.

Then we went to La Costa to catch a movie and it was all filled up!  I drove all through Encinitas with my lights out and didn't realize it.

Today I met Connie and we ate at Chilis in Clairemont.  We took a long time eating and talking and I am sure it irritated them but there was plenty of seating available.  When we got up to go to the restaurant (in a hurry) the waiter told us it wasn't available as there was work being done.  We were aghast and then he told us he was kidding.  I thought that was very mean of him.  I should complain to the manager!!!  You don't fool old ladies about that!

Truth and Memory

I have been listening to the book "Night" by Elie Wiesel about his experience during the Holocaust.  It is extremely interesting and now I find there is a controversy about it's truthfulness.  I quote here from Wikepedia:


Truth and memory

 

Ruth Franklin writes that Night's "resuscitation" by Oprah Winfrey came at a difficult time for the genre of memoir, after a previous book-club author, James Frey, was found to have fabricated parts of his autobiography, A Million Little Pieces. She argues that Winfrey's endorsement of Wiesel's work was a canny move, perhaps designed to restore the book club's credibility with a book regarded as beyond criticism. She writes that Night has a useful lesson to teach about the complexities of memoir and memory, and that the story of how it came to be written reveals how many factors come into play in creating a memoir: "the obligation to remember and to testify, certainly, but also the artistic and even moral obligation to construct a true persona and to craft a beautiful work ... truth in prose, it turns out, is not always the same thing as truth in life."

Wiesel tells a story about a visit to a Rebbe, a Hasidic rabbi, he hadn't seen for 20 years. The Rebbe is upset to learn that Wiesel has become a writer, and wants to know what he writes. "Stories," Wiesel tells him, "... true stories":

About people you knew? "Yes, about people I might have known." About things that happened? "Yes, about things that happened or could have happened." But they did not? "No, not all of them did. In fact, some were invented from almost the beginning to almost the end." The Rebbe leaned forward as if to measure me up and said with more sorrow than anger: That means you are writing lies! I did not answer immediately. The scolded child within me had nothing to say in his defense. Yet, I had to justify myself: "Things are not that simple, Rebbe. Some events do take place but are not true; others are—although they never occurred."

 

 

Now I am wondering whether to listen to the other two books in the Trilogy...???   And whether I commit the same folly... or do we all????

Life of "Camelot"

It is wonderful to have so much time to enjoy the arts.  At night I am listening to the book "Unbroken" which is amazing.  The author Laura Hillenbrand is the one who wrote "Seabiscuit" and her description is of such clarity.  "Unbroken" is the true story of WWII Hero Louis Zamperini, who was an Olympic runner.  His plane went down and he spent 47 days at sea and then two years imprisoned in a Japanese camp of torture.  The movie is being made this year.  He is 95 years old and still touring with his story and attitude of Forgiveness.  His survival was due mainly to his optimistic attitude and use of his brilliant mind, I think, much like "The Count of Monte Cristo" except that the Count was out for revenge, not forgiveness, but what a story.

During the day I have been watching the 1973 series of "Upstairs, Downstairs"   a lot like Downton Abbey.  I love the British series,  there are so many good ones.

Since Netflix was having a problem loading, today I watched TCM.  They are playing the classics, "My Fair Lady", "Camelot". "Hello, Dolly".

It has been awhile since I watched "Camelot" and I had forgotten how well done it was, how great Richard Harris is in it and how sad it is and how beautiful Vanessa Redgrave was as a young woman, and Lancelot, wow, who wouldn't love him.  The words of the songs so marvelously depicted the sad tale and the emotion was so raw.  I cried, I admit, and I couldn't remember how it ended.  I loved the ending, the positive outlook and quote about the young boy "being just a drop in the big motion of the sea but some of them sparkle, some of them sparkle" and the fact that what they had tried to do at "Camelot" would be remembered and the stories retold and others would try to live that way, too.   That is what it is all about, to try and make life good for yourselves and others and to do the best you can.  Of course, it was easy to be sympathetic with Guinevere and Lancelot, too, if you've ever loved passionately and hopelessly, anyway it is.

It reminded me of Richard's relatives who had tried to live the United Order in Nevada but gave up after two and a half years.  We are just so human and weak that someone always ruins perfection.  Reminded me of the Kennedy years, too, "Camelot" as it was called.  He betrayed his wife, he was shot and Camelot was destroyed.

We are so blessed to have song writers and authors who can take history and bring it to life for us in such poignant, message giving, and entertaining ways.

Fairy Tale Interrupted

Giving my eyes a rest, I have been listening to books on my Library To Go on my computer.  I listened to two so-so mysteries and then looked to the autobiography section and came upon the book "Fairy Tale Interrupted".

Rosemary Terrenzio was a young PR person who became the personal assistant to John Kennedy Jr when he started the magazine 'George".  She worked for him for five years until his death in July 1999.  She also becane a close friend of Carolyn, his wife, during that time.  Working for him and being close to Carolyn changed her life, as you can imagine.

This past year she had her memoir published about this time in her life and I found it very entertaining and enlightening about the Kennedys as well as life among the determined to be successful New York yuppies.  It was also very moving as she told about the struggle of her life to begin again and move on after their deaths.

Coming from the Bronz without the background and education of her mentors and those in the Kennedy lifestyle, it is a great listen to of how she learns and copes and becomes a necessary and important part of their life.  She narrates the book herself and I think this adds to its success, probably better to listen to than just read. 

Love memoirs...

When You Wish Upon A Star

I never realized what a beautiful song "When You Wish Upon a Star" was until Rod Stewart put it in his Christmas album this year.

 It is the song Jiminy Cricket sings in "Pinocchio".  I also found a darling video version by Linda Ronstadt that she made for a friend who had a new baby--she was giving her lullabies.

Disney include it in their album called "Disney's Greatest Love Songs" and I found the first verse which most versions do not include.

When a star is born
They possess a gift or two
One of them is this
They have the power to make a wish come true

When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires will come to you

If your heart is in your dream
No request is too extreme
When you wish upon a star
As dreamers do

Fate is kind
She brings to those who love
The sweet fulfillment of their secret longing 

Like a bolt out of the blue

Fate steps in and sees you through

When you wish upon a star your dreams come through.

Anyway love it sung as a Christmas song--thanks Rod Stewart.

Great Expectations

Recently I watched the movie "Great Expectations" and have been thinking about expectations and the problems that can come from our expectations.

With my music and imagination I live alot of my expectations in my mind.   I have learned over the years not to have expectations of people because they never do or say what you have high expectations for...but in my daydreams is a life rich with my expectations being met.

Some say we can't accomplish anything good without high expectations but others say to have expectations is to always be disappointed but I liked this from "Anne of Green Gables."  (which actually is great reading for adults),  I read of lot of the series last year but anyway the quote:

"Oh, Marilla, looking forward to things is half the pleasure of them." exclaimed Anne. "You mayn't get the things themselves; but nothing can prevent you from having the fun of looking forward to them.  Mrs. Lynde says, 'Blessed are they who expect nothing for they shall not be disappointed.'

But I think it would be worse to expect nothing than to be disappointed."

I remember when my  college roommate Colleen and I planned a trip over a break to go to one of the shows in Los Angeles--can't remember now what it was but it all fell through and Colleen was devastated but I told her I had already lived it in my mind so I didn't mind so much.  

I also liked this one-- "It is probably unfair to expect the world at large, or even most people, to see us for all we are.  It is essential, however, that we see ourselves for all we are."   by Victoria Moran "Younger by the Day

 

Shades of WWII Fears

I now know for sure I could never be a spy, I am too wimpy, fearful and have no guile.  I thought I would enjoy watching "Wish Me Luck" which is a British series on the British spies who were in Occupied France during WW II.  It specifically follows two young women as they sign up, are trained and then actually in France amongst the Nazis.

Today I had to stop watching, I am just too tense and frightened for them when the Nazis come around.  I did have terrible nightmares about the Nazis when I was in grade school.  We would see the newsreels at the weekend movies so we did have visuals of them in our minds and I probably saw movies with them portrayed as mean and evil.  At any rate I just am too nervous and worried as I watch so I had to go on to a love movie and probably will not go back to the series.

What better choice than a Betty Davis movie.  Oh, what good movies she made.  Today's film was "A Stolen Life".  Naturally I couldn't remember any of the story line but she has a twin who steals her boyfriend (young Glenn Ford) and of course, marries him and is not a good wife to him as she is the evil twin.  It was so enjoyable to watch I will have to find another one and stay away from the Nazi films. 

I don't know if watching the news is much better than watching the Nazis.  There is so much happening right now and none of it is good except I have heard a few Senators who are speaking out and finally making some good sense.  I realized again today why I never watch the View.  I saw a clip on the internet of them being so rude to Ann Coulter.  They invite her on the show, do not read her book, and immediately begin attacking her.   Ann Coulter does a lot of research, takes the time to write a book of her research and they just wing their opinions out at her.  Very strange I think and Elizabeth is the only one who has an opinion I respect anyway.  We really are a divided country.

Letter to Exiles

Glenn Beck read the letter that Steve Elliott of Grassfire.org wrote about being dejected after the election but then made a new plan after reading Jeremiah's Letter written to the Exiles in the  Old Testament, Jeremiah 29.   Jeremiah said the letter was for all the elders, priests, prophets and all the people (Jews) whom Nebuchadnezzar had carried away captive from Jerusalem to Babylon and he tells them to prepare for 70 years of captivity but then gave them this advice:

5 Build ye houses, and dwell in them; and plant gardens, and eat the fruit of them;

6 Take ye wives, and beget sons and daughters; and take wives for your sons, and give your daughters to husbands, that they may bear sons and daughters; that ye may be increased there and not diminished.

7 And seek the peace of the city whither I have caused you to be carried away captives, and pray unto the Lord for it: for in the peace thereof shall ye have peace.

8 For thus saith the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel; Let not your prophets and your diviners, that be in the midst of you. deceive you, neither hearken to your dreams which ye cause to be dreamed.

9 For they prophesy falsely unto you in my name: I have not sent them. saith the Lord.

And then, of course, he promises if they will seek, they will find Him and He will gather them from all the nations, and from all the places and bring them back to their home (speaking of the Last Days).  And we know what a successful people the Jewish people have become even as they have been exiled and scattered all over the world.

and Glenn Beck summarized it all by saying:

“If that is not one of the most profound things you have heard if you are looking for a plan ... Exile. Build. Have children. Marry them off. Strengthen, strengthen, strengthen. And be a blessing to others.” --Glenn Beck

Smith Center of Performing Arts in Las Vegas

Luckily I recorded "Dust to Dreams" on Friday night which was a celebration of the opening of the Smith Center of Performing Arts in Las Vegas.  The show was outstanding with special music from all genres but I was especially interested in reading about the history of the Center, where the money came from, how really spectacular a building it is and what it represents to Las Vegas.  Worth reading about.  The big funders for the Center were Donald W. Reynolds Foundation which came from the owner of the Las Vegas Review and other enterprises and Fred W. Smith, who managed them all for years and the city of Las Vegas.  Excellent reading how successful some people can become with their talents and ambition.

There is no doubt the Center will be to Las Vegas what Carnegie Hall is to New York, and so much more.  The Donald W. Reynolds Foundaton will have $100 million to donate a year for 45 years and then it will be closed.  The three children were given $50,000 a year for life but only $1 if they contested the will.  He died in 1993.  Fred W. Smith is still alive and summers in Lake Tahoe but has his main home in Las Vegas.

The show itself was narrated by Neil Patrick Harris which I did not care for.  He has a way of being crass about things that matter--not needed at all.  I would have liked to have known where the name of the Center came from instead of the lame joke he told about it.

One of the most special numbers I thought was three songs sung by Frank Sinatra and danced by a couple dressed in black dress and suit--really spectacular dancing.  Joshua Bell was also a favorite of mine and of course, Jennifer Hudson singing, "The First Time I Saw Your Face".  All of the Broadway musical numbers were wonderful.

It will be shown several nights in September on PBS, well worth the watch.

Nora Roberts

As a diversion from my family history recreations (which you can only work at so long before going slightly crazy) I read one of Nora Roberts novels "The Last Honest Woman".  I loved both of her main characters.  She makes me fall in love with her men all the time.  They understand women so well, wish I could meet one like that.   I have never met any like them but I wish I had--perhaps because I am not like one of her woman heroines either--I generally love them, too.

This wasn't always so.  In a lot of her earlier books, she had women who swore a lot and were a bit too aggressive for me to really like.   Actually this book is from 1988. I think she has matured into the best romance writer of all.  I love her Wedding Planner series, loved all the characters so much.   It is interesting to me that she continues to and always has written eight hours a day.  It is a serious job for her--no wonder she can put out so many books.  I love her triologies and will stop in at the book store today to see how many used books of hers they have that I have not read.  I then take them back to a Thrift store when I am done.

I can usually read her books in a day or so and I love that--they keep me interested and I just sit down and gulp them up.  What a wonderful escape from the hum drum life and too much work that we need to sometime disappear from...thank you Nora Roberts for the depth of your heroes and heroines.  I love them.

Unfortunate Mistake

Monday I was working on my Anderson and Larson Family Histories and I accidentally deleted ALL the posts, ALL my hard work and I did not have a copy of it.  I tried everything and did find some of the stories which had been backed up by Carbonite in 2011.  However, I forgot to renew my subscription or to use Webroot and it was not ALL backed up.

I was so depressed and angry at myself.  But hope springs eternal and I am putting it back on line and hopefully I will make a back up this time so it won't happen again!!!!!

The hardest story to replace has been the Benjamin Lillywhite, Jr. story and the Martin and Mary Jane Anderson stories.   I have it but not in an easy form to reconstruct so it is taking a lot of time!! 

Well, hadn't I just been saying I didn't have anything important to do...now I do.  Back to work.

Lunch in Pacific Beach

Today Linda, Maria, Meagan and I met at an outdoor restaurant in Pacific Beach and had fish tacos again!!!   Camber couldn't make it.  It was a lovely day and very enjoyable.

I forgot my camera!!!

I finished the book  "The Sun Also Rises" by Ernest Hemingway and tried to find the movie on Netflix--couldn't find it.  I was curious to know if I 'got' the movie when I originally saw it in 1957.  It was Hemingway's first novel--lots of dialogue--curious story line but interesting to keep reading and he was certainly praised for it.

I also finished Nora Roberts "Witness" which was a take off from "Girl with the Dragon Tatoo" in that the protagonist was a genious with amazing computer skills.  Actually vaery intriguing book.

Now I am reading a Mary Higgins Clark mystery, she is always fun and light to read.  I learned that although my San Diego Library cards are good at both County and City libraries I should return county books to county libraries--good to know.

I stated a new series on Netflix--an English series about WWII called "Foyles War".  The first episode was very good so it will be fun to continue with.  Last night I tried to watch Netflix on my computer and couldn't keep it going, not enough bandwidth or something but Sarah showed me how to watch it on their big screen.

Shanghai Girls

I went from reading about the Holocaust to the plight of the Chinese  immigrants in America and then on to Homosexuals.  There is so much injustice in the world it is very depressing.  I need to find something light and fun to read for a change.

When you read about what others go through, you realize how easy we have had it.  The book I just finished was "Shanghai Girls" by Lisa See.  I think I would like to read more from her as this was a most compelling book to read.   And it was also very enlightening.

Shanghai Ghetto

The latest documentary I watched on the Holocaust was about the Jews who migrated to Shanghai in 1939 while they were still able to leave Germany.  It is interesting that no one else in the world wanted the Jews but the Japanese admired them for their great skill in so many areas.  The Japanese owned parts of China at that time and invited them to come to Shanghai.  

It was not very wonderful but they would be able to survive.  The thing that was so impressive is that the Jewish Organizations from around the world funded soup kitchens and help for them.  Being the resourceful people they are, they soon had schools, rebuilt the apartments, had soccer teams, gardens, a synagogue, etc.  They built an excellent community.

Then Japan  joined Germany in the war.  The British and Americans in Shanghai were put in concentration camps and their riches taken from them.  The Jews were not put in camps but they were moved to a less desirable area which they called a Ghetto.  Still they survived and the Japanese did not harm them.  They were, of course, though bombed.

It was a most educational and well done documentary and prepared by one of the survivors.   Unfortunately the relatives who were not able to leave with them on the ships to Shanghai did not survive the war at all.

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

Because of a disagreement with Dish Network they gave me two free movies.  I chose "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close" as one and I actually ended up watching it twice, once last night and once today.

I enjoyed it most the second time, after I understood better what was going one.  The young actor Thomas Horn was incredible and I think what a challenge it would be to raise a child like the one he played.

What a tribute to a father (played by Tom Hanks) who would accept and understand his genius and strange child and contribute to his development by learning and giving him what was needed in his life.  And then for the mother to fill the void from the father's death by also learning what the boy needed.  It would be such a challenge not to override the boy's  zeal and forbid him his need to search and make sense out of what did not make sense.  He had incredible freedom in his search.

I thought the director did an excellent job though I must say the second time around was certainly alot more comfortable understanding the complex plot.  The moral that everyone has loss and sorrow in their life and must learn how to cope and how much better to have others who share the sorrow with you was very well stated I thought.

At Church on Sunday I felt a very strong spirit of love and charity for others and the need we all have to share with family and they share with us.  I find it interesting that in some families there is a strict policy of not giving or loaning money while in others there is a policy of sharing what is needed.  Some people feel just like a Bishop I once heard who stated, "they have only themselves to blame for their problems" which seemed extremely insensitive to me at the time.

Richard and I both grew up with familes who believed in helping, when you can, those in need.  I remember my Dad sending money to Mom's widow sisters even though he was not that rich himself.  One of them, Erica, took us children aside one day and told is to be careful what we asked our Dad for, as he would want to get it for us.  They all had great appreciation for Dad. However, they helped him in the depression when he needed it so badly.  He was returning that kind of love.

I was surprised when one of our members stated her son did not use food stamps when he was having money problems last winter.  I thought it strange that they thought he would need to since they have very ample means themselves.  But as I say all families are different in how they share with one another.  I appreciate that my sisters have been helpful to me and I have been helpful to them.  I am glad that Richard's nieces and nephews and children have remembrances of him always helping instead of the other way around. 

Charity is so much easier for some people to apply to strangers rather than their own family.  I have a hard time understanding that.

Who Do You Think You Are?

On Friday nights Ancestry.com is featuring a  TV show called "Who Do You Think You Are?" and they have been using movie stars as their subjects for research into their ancestry.

The most interesting part is that they travel to so many different museums and places where special records are kept and explain what kind of original records they have.  It is very educational and fascinating and never boring.

For instance I never knew that the British hired Hesian solders to help them fight in the Revolution.  Rob  Lowe's ancestor was one of them who stayed in America and became a Patriot and famous citizen in Ohio.  They read from original documents at various sights in Washington D C and New Jersey.  They then went to Germany and found more of his ancestors there in the Church records.

They could probably have found out all of this from records stored in Salt Lake City but it is much more interesting to go to original sources.

It is a really a well done show and should encorage many people to start tracing their ancestry lines.  I am ready to plunge into Ancestry.com mysself and see if they have anything I do not already have--of course, this is what they want...

Today

Interesting article today about all the lavish vacations by Michelle Obama and the costliness to the American Taxpayers. 

The surprising part were all the hateful comments following the article.  So much hate out there.  Not hard to understand why.

Also an interesting article about the Feds and their crackdown on Medical Marijuana and wondering why.  Pharmaceutical companies behind it???? Makes you wonder.

What did I say about seeing only beauty and good today.  Impossible if you read the news media.  I better take a walk instead.