Sunday, January 31, 2010

Collage Fun

Before I left I took all the calendars I have gathered and threw them in with my books. What has resulted with the time on my hands is collage pictures and boxes. Jacob, Jimmy, Lea and Kelsi each did large collage pictures that turned out nicely, mostly of animals. Lea and Kelsi also did collage boxes which look great. These are the collage boxes I have created. The nice thing about it is I have no expectation of perfection in my lifetime any more and so it is just fun cutting and pasting.

I still have a lot of calendars and only a few boxes left so I am on the outlook for boxes of all shapes and sizes. What will I do with all the boxes? I am giving the nautical one to Jacob for his birthday, keeping the large Carl Larsson box, and the others, well ,if you see something you like and have room for another dust gatherer, let me know. It is a shame to throw away all those calendar pictures so I will keep pasting as long as I have modge podge and boxes.

I remember hours of cutting and pasting from catalogs and magazines when I was a child. My mother made a glue of flour and water and it worked very well. No smell, no bad taste and it does stick. Tooth picks and popsicle sticks were used for spreading the glue.   What did we paste on? Anything we could find and if we were lucky, occasionally some store bought colored construction paper.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Kurt Warner

I have always admired Kurt Warner, quarterback of the Cardinals, and felt so badly watching him get hurt so much in Sunday's game.  Can't they play good football without so much damage?  It often looks so deliberate to cause injury--not just to stop a player.  Every time he was hit the tv would shift to his mother and wife to see how they were reacting.

At any rate I was listening to an ESPN station on the way to the doctor yesterday and they were reporting that he will probably be announcing his retirement today.  The announcer reported his wife as saying, "It was up to Kurt and God."  The announcer said he couldn't understand this at all (asking God for guidance in making decisions).  Although it did not surprise me that people think this way, it did surprise me that someone would admit it on the radio to the whole world and God.

As much as I will miss watching Kurt Warner, I know that with his character and commitment to God and family he will find a way to serve in a much greater way than just entertaining the masses in football.  Do what your heart tells you, Kurt, we are with you.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Another fun day.

Today I had a basal cell removed from the right side of my nose.  It was a year ago when I had the same procedure on the side of my nostril but it was much more serious and skin from my cheek was grafted on to the area. 

This time there are just stitches from the top of my nose to the bottom but no grafting.  Dr. Martin is very encouraging about how nicely the face heals and works very hard to have a pleasing conclusion.  I trust her.  She said the nose is very vulnerable to basal cell sarcoma and said she hoped this was the last of it on me.  Me, too.

She asked me how I was coming with my other doctor appointments I have lined up and she said the carotid surgery is the most important so I better keep pursuing that appointment.  I'll be glad when summer comes.

OK, Now I'm Feeling Vulnerable

After a lot of back and forth calling, I finally heard the results of my Carotid Doppler.  The right side is 70-80% narrowed and the left side is 16-49% narrowed.  Dr. Natali told me I need to be referred to a Vascular Surgeon.  I gave him two names but I think they were heart specialists and the vascular surgeon is in the same building but on the fourth floor.  Oh, well, I guess he will find who to refer me to down here.

As I read about the surgery, which I had convinced myself I wouldn't need, I realized it was a bigger deal than I thought.  I also read that the plaque is a mixture of cholesterol, calcium, and fibrous tissue.  I have never had high blood pressure or diabetes.  My cholesterol has been high forever but my HDL has always been high which is a plus.

I never smoked but my exercise is only walking or working in the yard anymore.  And my weight should be lower.  So next step is to see what a doctor says.  Yes, I feel very vulnerable.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Kelsi

These are some cute pictures of Kelsi I wanted to share.

More Birthday

I adopted this chic pix taken on my birthday as my official birthday picture.  It was taken after granddaughter Kelsi brought me the birthday glasses and before I had taken my curlers
 out.  I think it is so appropriate at this stage and age of life (77)--Looking at life through rose colored glasses and yet never being quite ready for whatever comes.

 I still haven't had my little cancerous spot removed from my nose.  It was so stormy this Thrusday it was postponed till next Thursday.  Now I read the storm coming may be worse this week--of bibilical proportions, whatever that means.

This is Kelsi, looking at her strange grandma.

On my real birthday, my son James and I had lunch at the Olive Garden.  It was delicious as always and we topped it off with a wonderful lemon cake.  In the evening Melissa and I went to the movie "The Book of Eli".  I keep wondering who wanted to push the importance of the Holy Bible so much that they would do it by enticing people in with the promise of violence (of which there was a lot).  Whoever wrote the script has not really studied the bible well enough to glean all of the truth of prophecy but it was a message worth getting.  The message is that we are putting too much value in the material things in life and not realizing what is most important.  At least that is what I got out of it.  The message was good but it was a strange, dark movie and I am not recommending it.

Saturday I picked up my new glasses at Costco and yea, the world is a little clearer and I can read without squinting so much.  Maria and I also saw "To Save A Life" which I would definitely recommend.  The theme was suggested by a Christian Church in Oceanside and the filming was done with non-Hollywood type actors.  The theme is teen suicides.  It was extremely well done, very entertaining and believable and the message was loud and clear.  We need to love and care about everyone and show it.  We get so busy with out own little lives we just don't see those around us.  Even if we think we are good Christians we are not doing what Jesus would do.  We are not being inclusive and we are not serving others.

Which reminds me of the darling child joke that Carole told me once and I have never forgotten.
"The teacher was telling all the children that they were here to serve others.  And one child raised his hand and asked, "What are the others here for?"  I love it.

Oh, yes, I missed two days of power outtages this past week at home and 4 feet of snow--way to go, Janet!  This has been some birthday, I never had so many birthday greetings.  Our lives are so different with cell phones, emails and facebook, it seems like we have so many more friends, but I wonder, do we really???  Something to think about.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Rain in Southern California and Snow at Home

My home teacher Ron took these pictures at my house today.  Thank heaven there was not a power outage at my house although there had been one all day in Chester and Almanor West.  Notice Ron plowed my driveway--what a guy, thank you so much!!!  Wow, this makes me homesick.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Happy 77th!


We all gathered at the Hardy home to celebrate my birthday.   There was my daughter Maria,  her friend Dave, and her children Melissa and Matt--my daughter Linda, her husband Gary,  and their children Tanner, Sarah and Kelly and Kelly's friend Matt--my son James, his wife Camber, and their children Jacob, Lea, Jimmy and Kelsi--my granddaughter Kristi, her husband Mike and their children Kate and Ryan.




Cute Granddaughters Kristi and Melissa.



Linda had prepared enchiladas and mole sauce with rice and beans and Camber prepared the salad and lemonades, James made the guacamole, and they provided chips and other dips and Maria brought the Red Velvet birthday cake and there was also ice cream.










Sarah and Kate












 






 


Kristi's husband Mike with Ryan and Kate




After eating at three separate tables, the girls were in one room doing karaoke and the guys were in another room doing Wii while some were just watching...Fun party.


Cute picture of the sisters!

Thursday, January 14, 2010

The White Lie, the Squib, the Untruth

When I was in junior high, I was in a play "The White Lie".  It left an impression on me but still it is hard not to lie sometimes.  I do not like to be put in the position of telling a social lie which makes me come off as rude or stand offish.  I do not like to act "as if" I feel a certain way when I don't so I can appear very rude sometimes, so which is worse rudeness or lying?  I am sure there is a happy medium there that I have not found.  When I was dating, I never had a problem being pursued by someone I didn't like, it was always very obvious exactly how I felt. 

Still lying is fascinating to me. 

Yesterday Kelsi (3) told me at least 3 squibs (as we used to call them).  When I said we needed to ask her Mom about going to the library, she told me she was gone, when I said we needed to ask her Dad if she could go to the library with me, she said he had gone away on the plane, she then contributed that her Mom had gone on the plane, too.  When we went in the house, they were both in the kitchen.  Later she walked across the courtyard to ask me if I would get her some cereal and milk.  I asked her where her Mom was.  She said she was gone to (?) some one's house.  When we went to the kitchen Camber was standing in the kitchen and the cereal and milk was on the eating counter.  Later when she was crying in the house and I asked her what was the matter she said her Mom had left her alone in the house. (Camber spoke up and said,"Kelsi, that is not true." ) I remembered that Kristi said that Kate was always telling lies, too.  Well, mothers, listen up, you have very intelligent 3 year olds!  According to an article by Po Bronson, she says this about lying.

"It starts very young. Indeed, bright kids—those who do better on other academic indicators—are able to start lying at 2 or 3. “Lying is related to intelligence,” explains Dr. Victoria Talwar, an assistant professor at Montreal’s McGill University and a leading expert on children’s lying behavior.

Although we think of truthfulness as a young child’s paramount virtue, it turns out that lying is the more advanced skill. A child who is going to lie must recognize the truth, intellectually conceive of an alternate reality, and be able to convincingly sell that new reality to someone else. Therefore, lying demands both advanced cognitive development and social skills that honesty simply doesn’t require. “It’s a developmental milestone,” Talwar has concluded.

This puts parents in the position of being either damned or blessed, depending on how they choose to look at it. If your 4-year-old is a good liar, it’s a strong sign she’s got brains. And it’s the smart, savvy kid who’s most at risk of becoming a habitual liar."

When we had a teenage niece staying with us I was very concerned about her outrageous lying.  I asked my psycholigist neighbor about how to stop it.  She said it was a very difficult thing to stop.  They needed to have something really horrible happen because of a lie they told, before they would try and change their behavior.

My fellow kindergarten teacher reminded me never to ask a child directly if he had taken something.  He will say "No" and that ends it.

I still laugh at how convincing Johnny was at 5 when he told us the nurseryman told him we needed to water our dying tree more.  We soon had waterlog under the grass.  The nurseryman said he had never told Johnny any such thing and that Johnny had never even shown him the twig we had given him.  (The nursery was in back of our house and we were frequent visitors there).  Strange we would give Johnny such a responsibility in the first place...talk about dumb parents.   Which reminds me, I think we all think of ourselves as poor parents from time to time but after meeting Vanessa in "The Darkest Evening of the Year" by Dean Koontz, I will never think of myself as a bad Mom again.  I don't know where he comes up with these evil characters he writes about but they are unforgettable.

Monday, January 11, 2010

I Can't Believe I Did It Again!!!

After Melissa and I had a birthday movie (Leap Year) popcorn and then a Mexican lunch I went to Walmart.  On the way home I stopped for gas and couldn't find my purse!  Not knowing whether I had enough gas to get back and right in the midst of evening traffic I headed back to Walmart.  Yes, I was praying my purse was turned in but could it really be safe for the SECOND TIME??? (When I was working in Sacramento a few years ago I had left my wallet in a Walmart cart.  The wallet was filled with cash and charge cards worth over $50K.  When I arrived back at the hotel I didn't have my card key and then realized my wallet was gone.  When I retrieved it from the Walmart Customer Service they told me it was not unusual to have the purse returned with all cards and cash intact.  "We have good people here," she said.  Could I really be that blessed a second time???

There was a long line but when I got to the Customer Service rep a call was made and the determination was that no purse had been turned in.  I asked if I could use a phone as I needed someone to come as I had no money or phone with me (yes, I had my keys but my gas tank was almost empty).  She asked for the number and I gave her Maria's cell.  She said she couldn't phone a long distance number.  I gave her James' cell number.  Same problem--she couldn't call a long distance number.  I couldn't remember their 760 number which she wanted.  She called for someone to come and help me and explained my purse was lost and I needed someone to call a long distance number for me.  The lady on the other end said a purse had been turned in!!  The clerk said that Kevin had just told her no purse had been turned in.  The other lady came,  she gave me my purse and lo and behold, cell phone was there, all the money was there, all the cards and my license were there. 

Now, if I had had gas in my car I would have driven home and not retrieved my purse.  If I had given them the 760 number, Maria or James would have come and I would have not retrieved my purse.  Thank the Lord for tender mercies, for the second time my scatter brained carelessness did not damage my life and financial situation.  And believe me this really proves without a doubt, if you have to lose a purse...do it at Walmart, they must have the most honest employees and customers ever.

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Hair Cut

Time to go back to having short, short hair.  Seta doesn't work a lot anymore but she always takes me right in and talks as she cuts.  This time we went short, short, and it feels good!!

Dr. Martin also called and said the spot on my nose needs to come off so more surgery on the 21st.  She said it won't be so invasive this time but I will be looking pretty ghastly for my birthday this year.

Listening  carefully to the technician  at my doppler test I got the idea that although I have plaque in my carotid arteries it will probably just be a thing to watch and not bad enough for surgery yet...that is good news so it is on to the next thing--eyes being tested and then new glasses so I can see better when I compute or read, yea....

Maria says it is good I am not working so I can take care of all these things, but of course, if I was working, I wouldn't be paying attention to any of these things...that is life.

When I called Fort Worth SBA the other day, they said there is nothing going on...

Friday, January 08, 2010

Moved

Oh, yes, I forgot to mention I had moved from Linda's house in El Cajon to James' house in Rancho Santa Fe.  I always enjoy staying at Linda's house because it is so quiet and peaceful.  Everyone is fairly grown up except for Sarah, who is in fifth grade, so everyone is working or busy and have learned to take care of themselves so the house stays neat and is quiet.  Even Sarah likes her room neat.  She spent half the day cleaning it and sorting out her clothes.  There is also a fantastic library by Linda's house.

But it is fun to come to James' house and be around younger children who are always playing games and having lots of friends over to play.  Lots of activity going on.  Kelsi is a fun little companion for me as we walk the dog or play together.  Tonight we matched dominoes and she did a super job.  I am lucky to have such nice families to spend my winters with and no time to get lonely.

It was 85 degrees today and so beautiful.  As I talk to my sisters and friends and hear how cold it is, I feel very blessed to be enjoying this gorgeous weather as well as nice company.

The Library

This morning I found a library just a few miles away.  And it is a very nice library.  I love libraries, I have said that before.  I have very happy memories of libraries, books and words from my early childhood days.

I ordered the second Stieg Larsson book--there are only 84 of us waiting for it, but since there are 43 copies it shouldn't be too long of a wait.  I was able to get another Gail T book and a Dean Koontz book.  I just read Dean Koontz  "Your Heart Belongs to Me" and what a fun mystery read.  Since he has written over 160 books I should find plenty more to enjoy.  The one I chose today I see is being made into a movie, "The Husband".  How can one person have that many stories in him, how can he make them all different?  It is beyond my comprehension.    

No Fear? How?

As I was driving to a Dr appointment today I remembered a cup my son John gave me years ago.  It said, "No Fear" and had a diamond on it representing the Difficult area of a mountain to ski.  I followed John once on a Diamond area only because he persuaded me.  But I took two turns and looked at what followed and skied to the side, took my skis off and walked down the mountain.  I never did learn to ski an area that I feared.  How does one live with "No fear"...  I would like to.  Ever since I slipped and fell last year and then fell flat on my face a month later I walk with fear.  It is a very unpleasant experience to feel so vulnerable and not be able to choose to not go in areas you fear because you just fear the most ordinary experiences of walking down stairs, walking down a driveway, walking on a cement walk with bumps, things you once did with no thought at all.  I just fear falling flat on my face again when I am not being careful.  I was talking to a friend and she feels the same way.

In my dreams I am always losing things, yes, that is a fear.  In my dreams I am also lost and can't find my way, that is a fear.  In my dreams, I either can't find my purse or there is no money in it, that is a fear.  Then there is the problem of not being able to get ready for wherever I am supposed to be going.  I can't find my clothes, I can't get them on, everyone else is moving on and I am still trying to get dressed, that is a fear, not being ready. 

As I was thinking about this fear thing on my way to a new medical building to me, I suddenly realized I was in a residential area and the ruffians on the side of the road looked a little scary to me.  Instead of using my GPS I was following directions from the Internet and realized I was not on the street I should be.  The main street had taken a slight curve and I stayed straight.  Thank heaven for my Garvin--I was able to pull to the side, plug in the address and get myself out of that strange area...fear, it was there.  Long before the GPS thing I remember being lost in LA in a strange area when I was going the wrong direction as I was looking for a Lender--the only way out was to call and ask for directions and we didn't have a cell then so I had to stop at a phone box at a gas station...fear.  I hate fear.  How does one live without it????

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Talk Given November 8, 2009 at Clear Creek Branch

Sheri Dew tells of visiting a ward in Oregon and at the conclusion of Sacrament Meeting a woman approached her and asked: “Are you the woman I think you are?” Her question referred to her identity, but Sheri Dew said the question has haunted her and it is a question you and I, sisters, could ask ourselves. “Am I the woman I think I am? Am I the woman I want to be? More importantly, Am I the woman the Savior needs me to be?

Who is the Latter-day Saint Woman of today?

Sheri Dew also tells about meeting with President Hinckley and in response to a question he asked her she said, “I love getting out with the women of the Church. They are so good.” At that he immediately corrected her. No, Sheri, They aren’t good. They are great?

So what makes the Latter-day Saint woman great?

I concur with President Hinckley, I am forever grateful for the great leaders and teachers I have had over the years in Relief Society especially in my early marriage years when I had so much to learn about marriage, motherhood, and homemaking. They were the example to me of who I wanted to become. They taught me things I couldn’t learn in college and things my own mother was too far, far away to teach me. And I am still learning from my Relief Society sisters.

So who is this Latter-day Saint woman and what makes her so great and what is her role in the church and in the world?

President Heber J Grant said, “Without the devotion and absolute testimony of the living God in the hearts of our mothers, this Church would die.”

Elder James E. Talmage of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles stated that “The world’s greatest champion of woman and womanhood is Jesus the Christ. Elder Russell Ballard said, “I believe that. The first time the Lord acknowledged himself to be Christ, it was to a Samaritan woman at Jacob’s well. He taught her About living water and proclaimed, simply “I am He, And it was Martha to whom he proclaimed. “I am the resurrection, and the life.. and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die.

Then during His greatest agony as He hung on the cross, The Savior reached out to one person—His mother ,when in that terrible but glorious moment He asked John the Beloved to care for her as though she were his own.

Elder Ballard also said Of this you may be certain: “The Lord especially loves righteous women—women who are not only faithful and filled with faith, women who are optimistic and cheerful because they know who they are and where they are going, women who are striving to live and serve as women of God.

Is this what makes a Latter-day Saint woman great—her testimony, her faith, her righteousness, her optimism and knowledge of who she is?

There are those who suggest, Elder Ballard said, that males are favored of the Lord because they are ordained to hold the priesthood. Anyone who believes this does not understand the great plan of happiness. The premortal and mortal natures of men and women were specified by God Himself, and it is simply not within His character to diminish the roles and responsibilities of any of His children.

Jan Marie Petersen had a shocking experience while serving a mission in Florida. One woman literally screamed the two missionaries off her front porch after they had introduced themselves, furious that they represented, in her words, “a church of male dictators where women cower in kitchens—mindless slaves to their husbands.” “Her words appalled me,” Jan Marie says. “They were so far from describing the many talented, confident Latter-day Saint women I had grown up admiring.” “Contrary to the world’s conception of the ‘place’ of a woman in LDS society, our places are as diverse as we are—our possibilities for achievement are as endless and exciting as our dreams.

President Joseph Fielding Smith explained, “The Lord offers to his daughters every spiritual gift and blessing that can be obtained by his sons (Apr 1970) All of us, men and women alike, receive the gift of the Holy Ghost and are entitled to personal revelation. We may all take upon us the Lord’s name, become sons and daughters of Christ, partake of the ordinances of the temple from which we emerge endowed with power, receive the fullness of the gospel, and achieve exaltation in the celestial kingdom. These spiritual blessings are available to men and women alike, according to their faithfulness and their effort to receive them.

We know that the basic doctrinal purpose for the Creation of the earth is to provide for God’s spirit children the continuation of the process of exaltation and eternal life. Yet, some people in the world do not understand that.

In Luftkin, Texas, Marsha Ault, who was eight months pregnant, was shopping with her husband and four children. She endured the curious, disapproving, and pitying stares of several of the store’s patrons before a woman approached her and asked, “Don’t you believe in birth control?”

The question sent Marsha and her children to the car, leaving Marsha’s husband to check out the groceries. Marsha began to cry, and her children asked what was wrong. “I tried to explain that many people nowadays feel it is wrong to have more than one or two children, and that people seemed to think I was very foolish to be having another child. “Then my five-year-old daughter, Ginger, said innocently, ‘Mama, we can duck down!” Marsha said she had never felt so small.

When I read this story the other day I had a really good cry and I don’t cry often. It touched me so much how willing Ginger was to just disappear just so her mother wouldn’t feel badly. And of course, her Mom didn’t feel badly about the children at all…we know that.

The Church’s proclamation on the family confirms that God has not revoked or changed the commandment to multiply and replenish the earth. Is this what makes the Latter-day Saint woman great, her willingness to be a Mom?

This doctrine does cause some women to ask: “Is a woman’s value dependent exclusively upon her role as a wife and mother? The answer is simple, an obvious: No!

Although there is nothing a woman can do that has more far-reaching eternal impact than to rear her children to walk in righteousness, motherhood and marital status are not the only measures of a woman’s worth. Every righteous woman has a significant role to play in the onward march of the kingdom of God. We cannot fulfill our mission as A Church without the inspired insight and support of women.

Elder Ballard went on to say; “For that reason I am concerned bout what I see happening with some of our young women. Satan would have you dress, talk, and behave in unnatural and destructive ways in your relationships with young men. The adversary is having great success distorting attitudes about gender and roles and about families and individual worth. He is the author of mass confusion about the value, the role, the contribution, and the unique nature of women. Today’s popular culture which is preached by every form of media from movies to the internet, celebrates the sexy, sassy, socially aggressive woman. These distortions are seeping into the thinking of some of our own women.”

The other day when I drove to Susanville my country station became static and I switched to the Catholic station. The discussion was on abortion, the after morning pill and unwed mothers. A young man called in and said, “ I wish you would tell the girls not to dress the way they do. I wish they would dress so that we wanted to look at their face and talk to them and get acquainted with them and find out if they are someone we really want to know and be with.” Instead of having our eyes drawn to their bodies and think other thoughts. The commentator made the observation that a community will have the morals of what the women have. That men will rise to meet the morals of the women.

I was telling this to my daughter and she said her son said the very same thing. They passed a group of girls dressed in the low and midriff t shirts and low hipped,short shorts and he said, “I wish girls wouldn’t dress that way.”

When I was working in Texas I was amazed at the strict dress code they had. Not that we had to dress in expensive suits, nothing like that. It was just no tight capris, t- shirts, low necked blouses, etc. This was a work place and there was to be no distractions in that way. And yet anything goes in our schools.

It was refreshing for me to hear this young man’s call and know it is not just LDS that are asking for better dress standards amongst our women.

Is this what makes a Latter-day Saint women great? That she dresses modestly?

President Dieter Uchtdorf repeats somewhat what Jan Marie Petersen said when he said “Because women’s potential for good is so great and their gifts so diverse, women may find themselves in roles that vary with their circumstances in life. Some women, in fact, must fill many roles simultaneously. For this reason, Latter-day Saint women are encouraged to acquire an education and training that will qualify them both for homemaking and raising a righteous family and for earning a living outside the home if the occasion requires.

The 70’s were a time of Woman’s lib but this is not why I was working fulltime in the 80s and it is not why most of my friends were now working. We had to work. Times had changed, interest rates were in the upper teens, businesses were failing, foreclosures were rampant. My husband was busy saving his investment clients and the business had to change. I had to come out of my comfort zone after 20 years of being a stay at home Mom and learn a new business that was forming—that of being a mortgage broker to the big banks—and it changed my life forever. This is what Elder Uchtdorf was talking about

“earning a living outside the home if the occasion requires.”

In the early 80’s I attended a Woman’s Week at BYU-Idaho (wasn’t called that then) my oldest daughter was attending school there and I remembered in particular three of the talks that were given.

One was from a white haired older gentleman and he told the women they needed to stay home and raise their children and not go out of the home to work. A younger Church leader recognized that many women were having to work outside the home and encouraged them in their efforts to sustain their family and marriage and work and do it all acceptable to the Lord. A third speaker reminded the young women that all their happiness could not be dependent on that one prince charming they were looking for to marry. They needed to become women who were happy with themselves and educated and prepared in a career of their choice in case they would be needed to sustain themselves.

Elder James E Faust said in speaking to women— You should work very hard to prepare for your future by gaining some marketable skills. However, it does not mean that women should be the same as men or try to do things the way men do them. Although some jobs that are traditionally masculine are now being done by women, it is possible for them to be done in a feminine way and yet be done equally as—or even better.

For the most part I have been treated with respect in the workplace but occasionally I have met some men who try to intimidate women.

When I was working in Hurricane Katrina one of my leaders had a lower payscale than mine and my friend Karen. It really bothered him and he was so rude to us. One day after he came to my desk and talked to me, I could stand it no longer. I stood up, walked over to him and pointed my finger and said. “Don’t you ever speak to me that way again.”—And he never did. As women we need to express which boundaries will not be crossed.

I remember when I was making copies one day in the office and I could hear a discussion by two secretaries on the other side of the screen. They were discussing the way the husband was treating one of them. One secretary said, “Janet would never let Richard treat her that way? And the mistreated secretary said, “Yes, but Janet is her own person?”—

Heellooo---Yes, sisters we are our own person—We are Latter day Saint women who know who we are, where we came from and where we are going and what we have to do to get there. We will not be able to fill all the roles of our life at the same time but we can do things sequentially—filling roles one at a time at different times We are definitely our own person—daughters of God, women of faith with a mission.

President Spencer W Kimball in speaking of the roles of men and women said. “our roles and assignments differ. These are eternal differences—with women being given many tremendous responsibilities of motherhood and sisterhood and men being given the tremendous responsibilities of fatherhood and the priesthood—but the man is not without the woman nor the woman without the man in the Lord.

Remember, in the world before we came here, faithful women were given certain assignments while faithful men were foreordained to certain priesthood tasks. While we do not now remember the particulars, this does not alter the glorious reality of what we once agreed to. You are accountable for those things which long ago were expected of you just as are those we sustain as prophets and apostles!

This leaves much to be done by way of parallel personal development—for both men and women.”

A recent book sent to me about Mormon Women featured a Humanitarian, a Jewelry designer and business owner, a teacher, a City manager, a historian, a public health administrator, a mystery novelist, a sign language instructor, a fashion designer, a chief justice, a poet. And certainly the arts are filled with Latter-day Saint actresses, dancers, writers. There is no “Molly Mormon”—that is a myth. We all agreed to come to this earth and complete our commitments but we all came with separate assignments and separate gifts and we are all unique.. Elder James S Faust said to him “Greatness” is becoming an individual of significant worth and a person of virtue so that your contributions are maintained in both human and eternal terms.

Elder Ballard expressed it this way:

I have been drawn to an interchange between God the Father and His eldest and Only Begotten Son, who is the ultimate example of living up to one’s premortal promises. When God asked who would come to earth to prepare a way for all mankind to be saved and strengthened and blessed, it was Jesus Christ who said, simply, “Here am I, send me” (Abr. 3:27).

Just as the Savior stepped forward to fulfill His divine responsibilities, we have the challenge and responsibility to do likewise. If you are wondering if you make a difference to the Lord, imagine the impact when you make commitments such as the following:

“Father, if You need a woman to rear children in righteousness, here am I, send me.”

“If You need a woman who will shun vulgarity and dress modestly and speak with dignity and show the world how joyous it is to keep the commandments, here am I, send me.”

“If You need a woman who can resist the alluring temptations of the world by keeping her eyes fixed on eternity, here am I, send me.”

“If You need a woman of faithful steadiness, here am I, send me.”

Between now and the day the Lord comes again, He needs women in every family, in every ward, in every community, in every nation who will step forward in righteousness and say by their words and their actions, “Here am I, send me.”

My question is, “Will you be one of those women?

Now, I know most of you want to. But how will you do it? How, in a world filled with deceptive messages about women and the family—and the significance of both to the Lord—will you constantly respond to the Lord, “Here am I, send me”?

For those who really want to live up to who you are, for those who want to see through Satan’s deceptions and who at all costs want to repent if necessary, I have two suggestions:

First, listen to and follow those whom we sustain as prophets, seers, and revelators.

Second, learn to hear the voice of the Spirit, or the voice of the Lord as communicated by the power of the Holy Ghost.

In November 2000, President Hinckley spoke to youth in a Churchwide fireside (see “A Prophet’s Counsel and Prayer for Youth,” Liahona, April 2001, 30–41). Have you young adults studied his message and identified things you need to avoid or do differently? I know a 17-year-old who just prior to the prophet’s talk had pierced her ears a second time.

She came home from the fireside, took off the second set of earrings, and said to her parents, “If President Hinckley says we should wear only one set of earrings, that’s good enough for me.”

Wearing two pairs of earrings may or may not have eternal consequences for this young woman, but her willingness to obey the prophet will. And if she will obey him now, on something relatively simple, how much easier it will be to follow him when greater issues are at stake.

I make you a promise. It is a simple one, but it is true. If you will listen to the living prophet and the apostles and heed our counsel, you will not go astray.

If you want to avoid the snares of Satan, if you need direction when the choices in front of you are puzzling and perplexing, learn to hear the voice of the Lord as communicated through the Holy Ghost. And then, of course, do what it tells you to do.

“Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good” (Alma 37:37

Who is the Latter Day Saint Woman today and what makes her great and what is her role?—She is a woman who can hear and responds to the voice of the Lord, She is a woman who at all costs will defend and protect her family. She is a woman who rejoices in her womanhood and has a spiritual confirmation of her identity, her value, and her eternal destiny. She is a woman of faith who follows a Prophet. And above all She is a woman who will stand up for truth and righteousness and simply say, “Lord, here am I, send me.”

None of us are perfected yet, we are all striving and often fall short of being the women the Savior needs us to be. Most of us will never do great things. But we can do small things in a great way. It has been said that “The smart learn from themselves and experience, but the wise learn from others.” I feel that is what we do as Latter-day Saint women—we learn from one another and there is a line from Martin Luther that applies to us today—he said “The kingdom of God is like a besieged city surrounded on all sides…Each of us has a place on the wall to defend and no one can stand where another stands, but nothing prevents us from calling encouragement to one another.” We are so blessed to not only have the gospel in our lives and the voices of the prophets to teach us but great Latter-day Saint women who continually encourage us to become the women the Savior needs us to be. For this I am very thankful and I say this in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen

Janet Hardy, Nov 8, 2009

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Stieg Larsson

Stieg Larsson is the author of  'The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" and he passed away in 2004 right after the manuscripts of  the Millennium trilogy  'The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo', 'The Girl Who Played with Fire' and  'The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets' Nest' were presented for publication.  There is  intrigue in his life as well as his books.  He had a life partner for 32 years.  He did not marry her nor did he write a will so the estate (and income) of his books rights goes to his father and his brother (who he evidently had little to do with in his life).  There is a fourth book on the computer held by the life partner.  She will not have it published unless they turn over the rights of the books to her.  The father and brother have offered her 2 mill.  It has been at a standstill for five years.  Before Larsson died he also had to take precautions for his life as he was threatened because of his exposure work of right-wing extremists.  He was a workaholic and accomplished a lot but I could not find out how he died.

Most of the comments on the bibliography site sided with the life partner.  However, this brings up the issue which someone said to me to the other day. "What is the use of getting married?"  Here is a huge reason for getting married--ownership rights.  Obviously he should have done a will at least.  Why do some very smart people overlook this crucial part of life???

At any rate I am looking forwarding to reading the second two books in the triology and hope that someday the fourth book will be published and I can also see the movies resulting from these books, even if they will be in a foreign language.  What a talented man, how sad he will not be able to go on with his great skills.  I hope the family can resolve their differences.  How sad he did not live to see the success of his work.

Monday, January 04, 2010

The Good Life

The nice thing about being away from my home and yard (though I miss them) is that I have more time to read non-stop.  I just finished  "Dancing Water" by Gail Tsukiyama  which Marilyn gave me for Christmas and I will read more of her books.  I am always happy when I find an author I really enjoy.  "Dancing Water" was about a child who had Werner's Disease in which the person ages prematurely and eventually dies at a young age.  It was sad and the whole book only encompasses two days but goes back and plays out their whole life.  Very moving and enriching to read. 

Now I am reading an exciting mystery which I can't put down even though it is about a murder over 30 years before.  I have read over half the book in one day and it is almost 600 pages long.  It is "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" by Stieg Larsson.  I will definitely read more of his books as well.  The book takes place in Sweden and it is fun to know about the places in the book having just traveled to Sweden this last summer.

My eyes get so tired though, I know I need better glasses.  I went to Costco today to see when I had bought these reading glasses and it was four years ago!!!  I can't believe that much time as gone by but I will definitely get my eyes tested and get new glasses.  It will be even more fun to read!

When I saw "Avatar" (which I really enjoyed) I saw that "Dear John" is coming to the screen in January.  It was one of my most favorite Nicholas Sparks' books.  Yea!

Oh, yes, and Nancy Meyers has another hit "It's Complicated!"--sooo funny.  You really appreciate her movies when you watch another so-so movie and see how uncoordinated and slow moving some of them are...

The movies cost way too much down here though--you can buy the whole book for the price of the movie!  And popcorn, wow, that is a whole other issue--movies and popcorn used to be a cheap date which Richard and I had every Friday--not cheap anymore.

Today I also enjoyed listening to the cd my sister Jeanne sent me for Christmas--Susan Boyle.  I knew her singing was good but it is even more pleasurable than I remembered, so good.  Poor Jeanne is in the hospital with pneumonia, we are all praying for her speedy recovery. 

My niece Stephi and her family were here this weekend and I hoped to see them but did not.  I don't drive out at night much anymore and being way out here in El Cajon I couldn't think where to meet them.   I have been gone from San Diego for over 10 years and hardly know where all the favorite eating places are anymore.  However, the sun came out today and they should have a lovely cruise down the coast...Meagan and I really enjoyed our cruise last March.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Christmas, Part 6, Pulsiphers, 2009

Puldipher Home in El Cajon






Around 11:30 A M Christmas Day the Pulsiphers all gathered for the traditional Omelet Party.  They are pretty awesome.  The Valkos and I joined them.  I didn't get many pictures though, unfortunately!

Eventually everyone began to gather in the living room and Amy had everyone playing a game of "What If"--lots of laughs.  It was really funny.

One of my favorite pictures, Melissa and I both look pretty and happy!!



I had seen Kate a week ago in Reno.  When she saw me, she said, "What are you doing in San Diego?"  She is only 3!  She is a thinker...


It was a very fun Christmas Day but on the way out to the car I had a very weird accident.  I was following Linda down the steep driveway when my foot caught in the gutter and I fell into Linda.  However, my head was held tight by her body while my body was falling and the result was my neck was bent severely back and it was the most painful thing I have ever felt.  I was afraid I had broken my neck.  (Greg, Camber's dad, called it 'buttlash'--apt name.)


The girls walked me slowly into the bedroom and I immediately asked for a blessing and ice as I was laid on the bed.  Gary and Frenchie gave me a blessing, which I appreciated so much, and Kristi tucked an icepack into my sweatshirt, close around my neck.  Matt gave me a 800 ibuprofen.  

Bummer, we were off to the movie and now I was going to miss it!!!  Finally, we took off for James' home and there Kelsi, Camber's sister, took over the nursing with ice on and ice off and more ibuprofen--by morning I was feeling fairly normal but my shoulders are still a little stiff.  I don't like this growing old business...  As they say "Old age is not for sissies!"

Christmas Morning, Rancho Santa Fe, 2009

Santa Claus has been here...

Kelsi loved her buggy


Bandido was bored with it all.

Kelsi is quite the clown.




A good Christmas.


Family Love


The older ones watching the younger ones...





The neighbors come to call.
 

It has been a good Christmas.

Christmas Part 5, Rancho Santa Fe, Christmas Eve Dinner 2009

Christmas Eve was at the home of James and Camber.  The Valkos, Camber's family and neighbors were all there.  The food was wonderful and so was the company.













Christmas Part 4, Rancho Santa Fe. 2009

After a delicious Christmas Eve dinner we settle down for the Christmas program at James and Cambers home in Rancho Santa Fe.



In the tradition of the years when my children were little and we acted out the Nativity Story with me narrating and Richard being the donkey carrying Mary to Bethlehem, James is the narrator and Chase is the donkey, Jimmy is the angel,  little Kelsi is Mary, Maria, Matt, and big Kelsi are shepherds and Melissa, her friend and Lea are the Wise Men.

The angel visits Mary to tell her she is going to bear a son and his name will be Jesus.

Joseph and Mary travel to Bethlehem to pay their taxes and can find no room in an inn.  Baby Jesus is born that night and laid in a manger.  The shepherds follow the star to find the Babe.  The Wise Men, too, have been traveling to seek the Baby Jesus.





The Shepherds and Wise Men visit Baby Jesus and Joseph and Mary for the final scene of the Nativity Story.
Joseph accepts gifts from the Wise Men for Baby Jesus




Jacob and Camber finish off the Christmas Eve with a beautiful Christmas duet.

John Hardy Memorial Hike 2015

My Life So Far