Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Chinese View of Being a Widow

I am really enjoying Agnetha's singing.  She has a very unique voice and an expert at singing sad songs.  It is interesting that Agnetha says "Winner Takes It All" is the story of her and Bjorn's break up and he says it was not.  He did write it when he was drunk just after they broke up.  She sings the song with such perfection and claims it is her favorite of the ABBA songs.  

Anyway I almost have the "The Emigrants" across the ocean but I have left it to read a couple of books which have to be returned at the end of the week.  Moberg really makes me feel what it was like to be a peasant in the 1800's with so little control over life.  So sad.  Someone's reasoning for not pursuing making 'Kristina' a  musical over here is that "Sad does not sell."

Lisa See's  'Dreams of Joy' is a continuation from her 'Shanghai Girls' which I read last year.  I was interested in what June's mother told her about the fate of a widow.

June's mother said:

...a widow is the unluckiest person on earth, because either she committed an unforgivable crime in a previous life or her lack of devotion to her husband caused him to die.  Either way, she's doomed to live out her life unloved by another man, for no good family will accept a widow into their family, she would know better than to accept, because the world knows that a decent woman should never go with a second man.  A miserable existence should be anticipated and accepted.

A widow should pray, fast, and recite sutras...she should dedicate herself to doing good deeds at her place of worship.  She should give up material possessions and devote herself to others like me: the socially dead. 

I've often been told that a widow's suffering will overcome vanity and attachment by wearing it.  A proper widow should confine herself to dark colors and maybe a few pieces of jade of good quality.

It seems that all of the books I have read this last week are about the horrible existence of women in some cultures and age.  I am blessed to live in this time and in America!!!

I know people think I write in my blog so other people will read it but I know there are only a couple people who skim through my blog.  It is a blog for me, it is a way a person can live alone and be able to express your thoughts when there is no one to talk to.  It is a way of recording your life and being able to go back and read what you thought or did at a certain time, quite therapeutic, I think it prevents loneliness because your time is so filled and you always have 'someone' to talk to...

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