Carnival!

What a nice end to a two month hiatus at the Pulsipher home. Jimmy had told us cruises were cheap right now so Meagan and I sailed on the Carnival Elation on March 19th to the 22nd. It was very restful and a great way to catch up after a long year. The last time I saw Meagan she was busy getting married so I especially enjoyed this time together.

The food was plentiful and available 24 hours a day--not quite on par with the Italian luxury liner on the Mediterranean with James, but still good. The first night we were so tired we couldn't stay up for the comedian's chatter at 11:30 pm but we enjoyed meeting our dining partners. A Father and Son bonding from Arizona and California, A Mother and Daughter bonding from Arizona (they were beautiful) and two women from USB In Salt Lake City. All friendly and talkative, especially the guys.

There were a lot of singles on board--Spring Break! So they were fun to watch.

In Ensenada we didn't take a tour but walked the town and bought fruitsicles and churros and I found a great sunhat for gardening in. The highlight of the trip was the 'Las Vegas type' musical and dancing shows the last two nights. Beautiful young girls with great legs and costumes--good singers, choreography and scenery. Very well done.

Since Meagan is getting ready to leave again on Wednesday I especially appreciated her taking the time to be with me. She is very patient with her Grandma. Luckily I didn't embarrass her too much with any falls or other stuff I sometimes do. We paid extra to have an ocean view and were glad we did!!

The beds were very comfy and we were given lots of attention by Elio--but they do not have hair dryers in the room. We had to ask for one...

I didn't take many pictures so will have to wait for Meagan to publish hers. A great trip and I recommend it highly to everyone--it is even cheaper now.

Enjoying Reading

One of the greatest pleasures of not working and having your eyes happy is being able to read. I am enjoying the El Cajon Library and encourage everyone to read Nicholas and Micah Sparks' book 'Three Weeks with My Brother'. It is not only an interesting look into most exotic places to visit in the world but it is the life of the Sparks boys. You get a lot into family dynamics and understand why he and his brother are so close and what great kids imperfect (crazy) parents can raise.

Nicholas who has had about five of his books made into movies (The Notebook, Message in a Bottle, A Walk to Remember, Nights in Rodanthe, The Guardian) published his first book when he was 30 and was astounded to receive $1 million for it. He was a pharmaceutical salesman and writing was just a hobby. He tells us who the inspiration was for the theme of his books and most were family members. You will be amazed at the hard life and tragedies they have had in their life so far. I really loved the most recent book of Nicholas 'The Lucky One'. So enjoyable to find authors you like when they keep writing.

At James & Cambers in Capistrano

Imagine having this out your back door each evening. Life doesn't get much better than that.

Meagan and I drove to Capistrano on Saturday and Linda and Sarah followed to see where the Hardys are wintering.

Jacob was suffering from a sore throat but on Sunday morning felt well enough to walk the strand with me. Wow, did we see beautiful homes and no one on the beach--

What lucky kids to be able to have a whole beach and ocean in their back yard!

The air felt wonderful.

James, Jacob and Roger were having a serious Monopoly game.

Roger Frith was best friend to James when we lived in La Jolla. He brought his wife Caressa from North Dakota to enjoy Southern California Sun!

We enjoyed eating and sunning and walking on the beach--wear your shoes though--there are lots of large and small pebbles and rocks.

Great way to get a walk but Bandido didn't like the rocks and kept sniffing at the surf to see what it was...

Every Monday Matters

I know I must be feeling a lot better because I have actually written something in my blog today! Also take the time to enjoy the video on the left called "Every Monday Matters." I am always wondering what I should be doing with myself. This movie has the answer...

Time To Catch Up

So I left my home in Lake Almanor on Jan. 21 after six days of physical therapy on my shoulder. There was no snow yet!! I stayed the night at my friend Myrna's home in Manhattan Beach and she had a birthday cake for me!! The next day I stopped and saw Camber, Jimmy and Kelsi at the beachhouse and received a birthday present and then on to lunch with James at the Fish House (great food) and then birthday dinner and presents with the Pulsiphers at Fuddruckers. Quite a birthday celebration for me.

The first Sunday I thought Tanner and his friend Levi looked so nice in their Sunday suits I just had to take their picture. They are skateboarding enthusiasts so I have watched some skateboarding on the TV with Tanner. I remembered when John and John D used to skateboard down our cul de sac and it all seemed so dangerous back in the sixties. What a long way it has come since then...doing things they never even imagined.

My arm hurt from all the driving so I started babying it...

Linda looked so pretty I took a picture of her but it turned out all dark so hope I have enough light in it now to show her lovely smile. Notice how yellow the grass looks, it isn't really. Linda is showing a lot of patience having her Mom here for so long. She has great meals and a lovely, peaceful home so I am enjoying the hospitality of the Pulsiphers very much.

I should have taken a picture of Sarah this last Sunday as she looked so pretty with her long curls. She sang in the Stake Conference. I am constantly amazed by Sarah and her ability to play for hours in her room. But you should see her room, it is delightful, especially with the sun streaming in. I must take a picture of it and Sarah soon.

As soon as I arrived in San Diego I called my dermatologist and she zapped me plenty with all my precancerous spots and took a test on a spot on a nose. Naturally it was positive basal cell so I have been recouping from having that cut out and a piece from my cheek used to cover. There were a lot of stitches and I thought I would show a picture of how it looked but it was too gross. Hopefully it will heal soon. The worst part was not being able to breathe too well so between that and my sore arm my sleeping has been sporatic and with no exercise to speak of I have gained weight again, (so what's new about that) so as they say in some book I read "I have been going through a rough patch."

On the upside I can recommend a lot of good books I have read. I read the update book on "Ted Bundy", "The Reader", "The Story of Edgar Sawtelle", "Sarah's Key", "Breaking Dawn", "Whatever You Do, Don't Run", "The Atonement", and "Katharine Graham". I can recommend them all for different reasons. Since four of them were very long (over 600 pages) I think I have done very well, since I did no reading at all while in Sacramento--just lots of Blockbuster dvds.

What else have I accomplished the last two months? Submitted my 2008 taxes and fortunately I am getting back most of everything I paid in! Yea!

High School Days

So here I am at age 15 with my friend Carla standing behind me. Earlier this year I had a picture of Chuck (second from the left) and Bill (center) and myself as we looked when we met at Denny's near Roseville where I was working last fall. Bill later sent this picture. Glendive,Montana had this huge round swimming pool with a walk and benches all around the edge. It was our socializing place. This would have been the summer before my sophmore year of high school. It is only interesting to me as it is a picture I had not seen before.

MY LIFE

I took Maria's suggested test on LIFE but since I have been recouping at Linda's house for the past month I don't know how reliable the results are but sounds like being nonproductive is a pretty healthy way of life!

Your score on the Suburbanite dimension (which ranges from 0 to 13) is: 5. By most estimates, you would be considered LOW on this dimension. You live an unconventional life that might be best suited for the middle of a big city or perhaps in the middle of a deserted prairie, on a mountaintop, or floating peacefully on your boat in the middle of the ocean.

Your score on the Cultured dimension (which ranges from 0 to 13) is: 5. Overall, you are fairly MODERATE on this dimension. You aren't taking your yoga classes too seriously -- that's probably good.

Your score on the Slacker dimension (which ranges from 0 to 13) is: 1. The Surgeon General would be proud of you because you are LOW on this dimension. You appear to relate to human beings more than to computers. You may even have a strong spiritual side to you. In your heart, you know that drinking or smoking to excess is a bad idea.

Your score on the Preppie dimension (which ranges from 0 to 12) is: 7. You scored in the MODERATE range on this dimension. You aren't obsessed with your appearance but aren't a complete slob either. Keep up the good work. This computer program thinks you have a generally healthy approach to much of your life.

Sounds like living a laid back kind of life is good!!! <

NEW YEAR

THINGS THAT GO BUMP IN THE DAY--ME, DOWN MY ICY STAIRS. DISLOCATED MY SHOULDER. THEY POPPED IT BACK IN PLACE AT SENECA EMERGENCY ROOM--LUCKY ME, NO BREAKS OR TEARS...LOTTA PAIN AND HARD TO BE ONE HANDED FOR AWHILE. MARIA HERE NOW, THANK HEAVEN. WILL BE INTERESTING TO SEE HOW I DO WHEN SHE LEAVES. NO MORE MESSAGES IN HERE FOR A LONG TIME, I THINK. HAD WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS WITH VALKOS IN PARK CITY.  PICTURES MUCH LATER.  HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Farewell Dinner, Sacramento SBA

 

We had a Farewell Dinner on Friday and this is Maribeth, my pod partner, and John, my Supervisory Loan Officer. I had the salmon which was marinated in ginger, brown sugar and bourbon. Delicious!

Jody, the lady, is our trainer, Edwin, in red is our leader, Greg in glasses was my car partner and fellow traveler from Maryland to West Virginia in Hurricane Isabel and Chuck, with the hat was my car partner for awhile here in Sacramento.

Thanksgiving and Christmas 2008

We have been Christmassing in Park City. since 1976 but this year the only ones there for the early week are Maria, her children Mike, Matt, Melissa, Mitch and me sharing the unit. 

I was released from SBA duty on December 19 in Sacramento, picked up Mike from college and then drove to my Lake Almanor home and met Melissa and we drove straight to Park City the next morning. 

 Martin, Richard's brother and Kathy were also there early waiting for their children's families to arrive. They were fun to visit with, only time I ever see them is Christmas, it seems. 

 We like Christmas in Park City because it is simple, we play games, eat ski or snowboard, have a 

Christmas program of sorts and always the white elephant gift game.

Maria brought her portable Christmas Tree!!!!

White Elephant Gift Time

Dinner is always good but not time consuming. I remember one year especially when we put the turkey in the oven before we went skiing, bought a Christmas tree really cheap on the way home and had Christmas dinner that evening. It is always good no matter who is there and what we eat.

Matt was the only one snowboarding. Mitch and Mike spend time on their computers and the girls shop and usually sit in the hot tub. And we always have fun playing games, going to movies and watching tv.

This year the hot tub was not working so that was a great disappointment. 

I also enjoyed watching from our window the construction work going on in front of Meagan's unit, which is why they went to Hawaii this year. Maria was also doing some dating on the side, so that was an interesting sidelight!

 

Matt in his snowboard gear. And he showed us how he can board down stair railings, too.

 Mike kicking back from school and watching tv when he is not on the computer.

Maria's family poses for a picture together. It is hard to get family together in this crazy world so we appreciated this time. 

Melissa all ready to go shopping, shopping, or looking, looking since everyone was saving money for college this year. Mitch and Maria ready to go for an outing also. Maria and Matt pose at Temple Square.

 

We always make our trek to Temple Square. It is always bustling with visitors, Christmas trees, the Nativity Scene and beautiful, beautiful lights. It was a good Christmas! Thanks, Valkos, for letting me share Christmas with you.

Thanksgiving 2008

For Thanksgiving Maria and her four children had Thanksgiving in my hotel room in Sacramento.  I was still working for SBA.  This trip was quite lonely except that Mike was in Sacramento, too, so I would often pick him up to eat.

Maria brought the creamed corn and Melissa had luscious spinanch dip but the turkey I shared was not too great.  Maria say, ""the turkey is the part of it," and that is so true.

After returning from Christmas I had my slippery slide down my front steps and didn't do any blogging for almost a month so here goes Christmas 2008. By the way I had no time to get Christmas cards out in 2008, maybe 2009 will be the year for cards.

 

Ken, My Best Friend in Sacramento

Ken, my GPS Australian guide, has become the most important man in my life. Two days in a row as I have driven to work I have become lost. How can this happen when I have ridden the same route about 90 days in a row? I have been driving my own car as I had things to do after work and it is simpler but each day the traffic has been backed up and so I have taken an earlier turn thinking I knew the way. NOT! When I realize I am lost I pull out Ken and he directs me with u turns and such and I have to trust him completely as I have no idea where the roads go he is taking me on. It doesn't help that I have a hard time reading the signs. Must be an analogy there somewhere... Remember it is dark at 6:30 in the morning.

As it happened for a second time today (and Yes, I have been late for work) I thought again of Maria and her comparing the GPS to the Lord getting us out of our self-imposed jams in life. And how important that trust is as our life takes unexpected turns and takes us on unknown roads that all lead us to our intended destination if we can just trust and follow directions. Follow the Leaders, follow the scriptures, how hard that is to do sometimes, we think we know better...

Thanksgiving 2008

Wow, it is really going to happen, we are actually having Thanksgiving Dinner in my hotel room--it is a open doubled sized room which I like better than a bedroom and living room suite.

It was so nice having all the wonderful side dishes that everyone brought--so much better than one meal at the Black Angus and that is it--the turkey was not that great, too bad about that but as Maria says, "the turkey is the least part of it" so true.

It was so nice having Maria and all the Valko kids here for Thanksgiving--this has been an especially lonely deployment. I don't know what I would have done if Michael hadn't been here to go out with on Saturdays.

Thanks Valkos for all the good food and fun on Thanksgiving...I had to go to bed early, work the next day at 7 AM but they let us out early at 1:30 and I enjoyed seeing Grass Valley again and the charming city of Nevada City with Maria and Matt.

Loved this Spinach Dip of Melissa's and the ramaki of Michaels--sooo good.

Maria's creamed corn was fantastic as always and she made lots! And her new recipe for yams was really good too.

And Melissa's new way to do pumpkin pie was delicious.

It was all very good except for the turkey...

It was a beautiful drive on Saturday through Auburn, Sierra Valley and Placerville's Apple Hill with Mike and Maria. I had the best apple turnover I think I have every eaten. I have a very special memory of buying apple turnovers at the Bakery in Glendive as a child and teenager and having the flaky crust get all over your clothes...always looking for some as good. These were. Nice Thanksgiving, nice weekend. Thanks kids!

Remembering Richard

You can tell the value of a man by the way he treats his wife, by the way he treats a subordinate, and by the way he treats someone who can do nothing for him.-- Ken Babcock

12 Years...

It was twelve years ago tonight that Richard and I flew into Reno for Thanksgiving and Maria came down to meet us. I still have very vivid memories of that early morning on the 25th and the days that followed. It was also Thanksgiving time that my brother passed away. Not a good time for me.

I also realized that I have now been single longer than I was married. We were married for 37 years. I was single the first 26 years of my life and now 12 more. I don't know what that means or why it is signigicant, I just noticed it, that is all.

I was also thinking today of all the different places I have had Thankgsiving. Let me see how many I can remember.

Ogden, UT---Glendive, MT---Orem, UT---Provo, UT---Big Bear, CA---Pacific Beach, CA---La Jolla, CA---Sacramento, CA---Fort Worth, TX---Rancho Bernardo, CA---Susanville, CA---Lake Almanor, CA---Baltimore, MD---Galveston, TX---Phoenix, AZ---Las Vegas, NV---El Cajon, CA---Carlsbad, CA---Knotts Berry Farm, CA Have I missed any??? Of course, I can't remember how many at each place...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, FAMILY, I LOVE YOU ALL, WHEREVER YOU ARE. I wonder what Richard and John are doing!

And where in the world have you spent Thanksgiving?

Another Weekend in Sacramento!

A few weeks ago I saw a lady "threading" at the mall. I remember Meagan had told me about it from one of her trips. This weekend I went back looking for her and couldn't find her. I wanted to get my face threaded. You can have just the eyebrows or whatever but I wanted the whole face. I asked a few people and finally a lady in JC Penneys knew which store she was near...and she has her own little store inside now!

I really like it. Only takes about 10 minutes. I can see a few she missed but looks good. I can see I will have to take a monthly trip to Sacramento Roseville Mall!

They have also opened a huge other side to the mall with a huge food court. I chose Rubio's Fish taco but couldn't find a place to sit. Finally a lady beckoned to me, she was alone also. A former realtor, widow living in Roseville. Had a very interesting visit with her and she is 79. Then when I walked into Macy's a lady selling perfume caught me and chatted. She was 71 and telling me what a great age we were and how beautiful I was, ha. (Remember she was selling perfume.) At any rate it was fun to have somebody my age to chat with for a time.

Saturday I had two dates. Mitch was here, too and Mitch and Matt kindly went to the Harvest Festival with me, food wasn't that great but we finally ended up at a movie and it was good. Enjoy having such neat grandsons to go out with! Michael said he would do the stuffing and an hor dourve for Thanksgiving and something else...anyway we, Maria and children, are all getting together in my hotel room. Should be fun, I have a big room!

Oh, yes, I finally broke down and used my 20% off in Macy's and tried some new jeans and tops. Problem is I can't tell blue from black so will be interesting to see what they are...

What Do I Do For Fun?

Well, the gauntlet was thrown out. What do I do for fun?

On first thought, I couldn’t think of any fun I have…but on second thought the things that make me smile or laugh or just feel good. That is my fun…and here they are – in no particular order.

Phone calls with my daughters, sisters, son, grandchildren, friends…very enjoyable.

Having ‘one on ones’ with my grandchildren and great grandchildren: From spending hours with Kelsi, getting acquainted with Kate, having dates with Michael, watching Mitch play, learning how to use Skype with Amy, talking to Craig, chatting with Kelley, movies with Tanner, walking with Sarah, playing games with Jacob, zooing with Jimmy, doing the mall with Lea, having Meagan visit or traveling with her, working with Matt at my home, visiting with Kristi on the phone—all of my one on ones with my grandchildren are great fun to me.

Reading the blogs of my daughters and grandchildren…love being a part of their lives that way.

Sharing stories and memories with a willing audience. Lately it has been the little Filipino gal I work with. Sometimes a few minutes break from work is telling tales about ourselves. She said the other day, “I love hearing your stories.” She’s half my age and very kind to me.

Enjoying a movie with buttered popcorn, hot tamales, and Dr. Pibb. I am in heaven when I indulge like that.

Having a good pedicure…need I say more.

Watching a greal musical or good music show. Tonight I am enjoying the Country Singers…

Being immersed in a truly enjoyable book and read it day and night till I finish.

Cleaning up the yard…yes, that is fun. Cleaning the house is not!

A really romantic movie, a really sad, moving movie, a movie that makes me laugh. Movies have always been great fun to me from the time I was 5 or so.

Listening to my favorite music…

Watching an exciting football game…

Dancing around the room…

Having some cute guy say funny things that make me giggle or laugh out loud…anything that makes me laugh out loud is good.

Notice there are not many things I “do” for fun…no sports, no activities, no exercise, no crafts, no cooking, no sewing, hmmmmmm...

High School Musical

That was the best time I have had in a long time. What a great movie--very, very enjoyable. Would love to see more like that. It was very nostalgic for me as well--the attitude they had toward life was the attitude we had for life back in my school days. Great music, great dancing, so nice to see young people positive about life, and full of life without any profanity. Kudos to all the makers of the film. When you go, be sure and stay for all the names and music at the end. So many people involved in the making of that film. Hope, hope they make more. This was definitely the best of the series. I could see all my fantastic grandchildren dancing around in the film. Life is good when we see the joy in it.

On Voting!

I did get to vote yesterday by absentee ballot. I didn't know if I would be able to with this traveling around...

Earlier in the week I had received a card from my Plumas Registrar stating that I had recently registered as a Democrat and questioning if I had moved. I immediately wrote them a letter about my experience. I told them that:

After being in Texas and arriving in Sacramento I saw a voter register person in front of WalMart and told him I needed to get an absentee ballot but I lived in Plumas County and what should I do? (I should have known better, these guys are just paid to get registrations and probably know nothing about what I asked) Anyway he said to just register here and he would take care of it. So I did. Anyway I also told the Registrar that I had certainly never registered as a Democrat.

Surprisingly I received a call from a lady at the Registrar's Office and they said they were sorry for my experience but they would send a ballot right out and to get it back asap. And yes, the Democrat box was checked by someone!! They also said if I wanted to change that I would have to register again before the next election.

Anyway I felt like a really important person instead of just a number that they would give me that kind of attention to actually call me at the office and send a ballot! Yesterday I went out for lunch and saw this written in a community newspaper:

"This has seemingly been the most antagonistic and violent campaign period in our lifetime. From stolen signs from people's front yards, to vandalism, to beatings by opponents, Americans have faced a stress-filled two years of a barrage of accusations from all parties and a relentless television schedule of pundits points of view that has given the voting public more than we need to know, and very little of what "we need to know."

And isn't that so true!

Tender Mercy...

Was on me tonight. I wasn't thinking well, very tired but I hadn't shopped for two weeks and tomorrow is another 10 hr day and I had no lunch food, etc. so I felt terrible being one of those Sunday shoppers at Wal Mart, but there I was.

After I left, I missed my turn on Galleria and ended up in Rocklin and had to swing back so it was about 30 minutes before I arrived home and then I realized I didn't have my billfold!!! I must have left it in the cart when I unloaded. Would anyone actually find it and turn it in???

I hurried back and looked in the cart holder where I had put mine, not there, all the time saying silent prayers and thinking how was I going to cancel all those cards before someone had a buying spree. I had my cards, which I seldom use, the government card, my debit card with all my savings--over $50,000 total in chargable cards... plus about $100 in cash. Would anyone turn that in???

As I was waiting for a clerk in customer service I was trying to imagine what I would do if she said it wasn't there...who would I call first, what would they do to me for losing a government card, why do I carry all that in my billfold with my drivers license, SS card. It is stupid. I seldom use any but my gas card and debit card for grocercies and cash. Why do I carry them all together?

Finally it was my turn. She said, "Yes, I do think someone turned one in a little while ago. We have it locked up. Let me ask my supervisor." Her supervisor comes back WITH THE BILLFOLD! She said, "You know, our customers are so good. We get lots of billfolds turned in. Most people think that no one will turn them in but they do."

Sort of makes you feel good about mankind doesn't it and...tender mercies of the Lord, taking care of me.

Oh, and all that cash was still there...

Life as I know It

What is my life today? Helping victims of hurricanes get the monies they need to repair their damaged homes and damaged lives...

The time goes so fast at the office, it is hard to believe I am working 10 hours a day now--from 7 am to 5:30 pm (we are usually there early to check our business emails and set up the computer with the programs we want on call). Believe it or not they chose some select ones who are "producing well" to work longer hours and I was amongst them (surprisingly).

First thing is to check and see how many files you have in your Que. This is usually 15 or so. Those who are the "oldest" need to be worked on first. Most of my old files have been from Hurricane Gustav. More and more are from Hurricane Ike every day. Ideally you will complete a file every two hours. This means you will have made a loan decision of Approval, Denial, or Withdrawal and then zapped it (through the computer program) to your supervisor. If you did well, he will send it on to legal where they check for errors and then letters and documents or letters of denial are sent to the hurricane victim. If they are denied, they may be referred back to FEMA for help. This seems like adequate time but...

The aim is to be thorough, just, compassionate, knowledgable, compliant with the SOP (standard operating system) and complete the file before the clock runs out. All files are to be finished from application by victim, to verification of damage by the appraiser, to approving or denying in less than 14 days. By the time it shows up in my que it may already be 12 or 13 days old.

My job is to make the decision from all the financial and appraisal information (that has been fed into the system), communiating with the insurance company, seeking online for ownership of the property, checking FEMA records for distributions by them, checking their credit, talking to the applicant and eventually communicating to the applicant a decision they are hopefully happy to hear. It sometimes takes more than one phone call to complete this.

The hardest part is doing this all with a paperless file--reading everything from the screen, not being able to lay the credit report out in front of you, etc. Learning how the program works is still a challenge. You not only have to conquer the computer program, you have to know the rules of lending, etc. We have thick books and memorandums and fortunately supervisors to help.

The good thing is the very nice working conditions we have. Great chairs, desks, large computer screens, large desk space. The building is very lovely and is the same one I worked in all through Charley, Jeanne and Ivan.

And we come home to a great homecooked meal at the Homewood Suites and get sent off with good breakfasts. The Marriott Residence Inn people don't have quite the good meals we do.

My BIGGEST problem is falling asleep too early and then waking up too early, how do I break this cycle????

I just read that one of the reasons we gain weight is if we are sleeping 6 hrs or less--wow, that is me!

As I have written this it has just occurred to me that two hours should be more than adequate time--I have been doing 3-4 a day--I have to do better, I just have to get more efficient, more focused, and less frustrated with waiting for the computer to do it's thing--and never have to look twice at the same thing, that is the trick. Do it once and do it right...make notes you can read...onward and upward...

"About Me" on a Sleepless Night

ABOUT ME: Janet--

1. I AM: alone most of the time
2. I WANT: more joy and security in my life
3. I HAVE: a wonderful family whom I love so very much
4. I WISH: deep love for all my children and grandchildren
5. I HATE: listening to pompous men talk
6. I MISS: Richard and Bandido
7. I FEAR: being poor and alone
8. I HEAR: less clearly than I used to
9. I SEARCH: for joy, peace and security
10. I WONDER: if I'll ever be what the Lord intended me to be
11. I REGRET: not being more careful what and how much I eat
12. I LOVE: music that makes me feel romantic
13. I FORGIVE: everyone whoever made me feel sad
14. I ACHE: all over my body too often
15. I ALWAYS: eat too fast
16. I TRY: to do my best most of the time
17. I AM NOT: finished yet
18. I SEEM: unfriendly and aloof much of the time
19. I KNOW: that God lives and wants us to have joy in our life
20. I FEEL: very alone much of the time
21. I DREAM: I am lost or my things are lost alot
22. I GIVE: thanks everyday for all the blessings I have
23. I LISTEN: to the scriptures and my music every day
24. I LAUGH: not as much as I would like, I need a good laugh a day
25. I CAN'T: make myself exercise or walk enough
26. I WRITE: very boring stuff
27. I CRY: very seldom
28. I SLEEP: for six hours and that is it, no matter I am still tired
29. I AM NOT ALWAYS: able to focus on what I am hearing
30. I SEE: less well than I used to
31. I LOSE: everything but weight
32. I CONFUSE: easily, more than I should admit
33. I NEED: more joy in my life
34. I SHOULD: enjoy being with people more
35. I SING: seldom at all anymore--I used to love to sing...hmmm
36. I DANCE: around the floor for 20 min in the am, my only exercise...

Hey, I Am Getting It...

Today I had my first performance review from the SLO I had from 9/22-10/3. The first week here was just training and then we started processing. I thought I was doing so badly but he actually gave me a really great review (I shouldn't have complained about him) and said I was in one of the top 3 in points (production) even though none of us are up to what they want from us...everyone must be struggling.

I am finally catching on to the program and quite enjoying it. Plus I am right next to my really great new SLO who is extremely forthcoming with advice and hints on what they want and right across from me is a computer guru who always knows how to do what if I get stuck so a pretty good situation right now.

Today "The Duchess" started at a theater here so I ran over after work and quite enjoyed it. Kara Knightly is great in it and it is historical fiction, which I always love, from the book "Georgeana, the Devonshire Duchess" or something like that, based on truth. Quite an interesting story and well done I think. A sad tale of having to live your life according to what is expected of you. Hey, isn't that the life we all live?? Of course, women didn't have it so well back in the 1700's, we have a pretty great world right now, even with all it's problems.

Twice this week I set the timer so I could watch TV from 9 to 10 and believe it or not I didn't see one minute of the shows either night. I am so tired I fall asleep as soon as I close my eyes, problem is then I awake at 2-2:30 so that is a problem! Also the eating too much and exercising too little. Hopefully when I am more relaxed about what I am doing, that will change.

Have you noticed?

It's been a long time since I went to "In and Out" and I was shocked to see the size of the cheeseburger and shake I was served this week. They are about half the size they were in the 90's.

Then one day when I took the wrong road looking for a Jiffy Lube I ran into a Dairy Queen. Remember the Blizzards we used to buy at the DQ next to Choice Mortgage on Genesee? Half that size now!!

I must agree I shouldn't have been buying either one and I doubt I will again.

I walked into Macy's last week to buy some facial cream and I had to pass a lot of clothes on the way. Ugly colors, ugly styles, ugly prints, ugh. Then a few day ago I walked through Nordstrom's Rack. Ugly colors, ugly styles, ugly prints, ugh. Tonight I walked through Marshall's to look at the fun things in the back and I had to pass a lot of clothes on the way. Ugly colors, ugly styles, ugly prints, Ugh. Are the styles and colors just reflecting the depressing economy we are in??? Wow, take a look and see if you see any happy colors and styles out there...

Learning Curve is UP!!!

I am so glad Maria brought Mitch down last weekend. It surely cheered me up! Maria has such a great way with words, in voice, as well as on writing. I know we all enjoy reading her sobering messages that teach us each day. Thank you, Maria, for all your insight and beautiful way of voicing it.

I had never eaten a dinner at the Cheese Factory and I had the Bang Bang Chicken and Shrimp. It was so delicious. There is a Cheese Factory a block from my hotel and I bet it is not as crowded as the Arden mall one, we will have to try it sometime. We had planned on going to a movie but Michael got sick, so Michael and I hope to catch it this weekend.

I cannot go away overnight without checking out and back in the hotel (company rule) so if I go home for my winter clothes it will have to be on a quick run on a Sunday!! I really like my room and location of room and if I am going to be here till Christmas I want to keep this room.

We haven't started working 10 hrs yet and I am already so tired...

I finally feel like I am "getting" the computerized paperless loan processing program we are learning. Today I had a very productive day and feel like I have had a breakthrough. Maybe now I can stop doing this nervous eating.

The fact that I have a new SLO has certainly helped. He is the nice car partner who toured us around Dallas and kindly went with Betsy and I to dinner a lot. He is a team player, non judgmental, teaching without intimidation, kind of leader and we are all doing better under his tutelage. He acted happy to have me sitting next to him again also cuz he says I am the most organized person he has ever seen and probably thinks I can be of help to him once in awhile, too. We both miss the Necco Wafers I ran out of cuz Wal Mart doesn't have anymore!

He is about the age of my John. Just a really nice person. Comes from Buffalo. Our other SLO was knowledgeable but intimidating with sarcasm. I thought I was the only one who thought he didn't like me but Suzanne said the same thing today. We are both doing better with John. (He is a John E also). I don't understand why all leaders don't understand that a positive and comfortable working environment has positive results.

Now if my eye would just stop twitching, we are all having trouble with our eyes--could it be the lights, the computers, the???????

It's All Relative

Last night someone sent me an Obituary Archive from my hometown. I was interested in reading about the lady I worked for one summer during college.

It was a drive in--and I worked inside and my sister worked outside. The couple that ran the restaurant had recently married--second marriages for both I assume. They were always being kind of romantic and I thought it was so weird because they were so old!!!

Now as I read her obituary I find that she could have only been 43 at the time--that is younger than my daughters are and they seem so very young!!

And when I was in grade school my mother was in her early forties and I thought she seemed so old. Oh, my goodness. I guess it is good we feel that way or we wouldn't have respected them as much as we did but it is so hard to believe in retrospect.