Keira at Easter 2012

 

Kelsi and Keira

We Miss You, John!

In 1963 we traveled to my parent's home in Idaho Falls and then on to the Cabin at Silver Gate.  John is all decked out in the cowboy outfit we bought at Ferrell's Store in Idaho Falls, (which was managed by my brother David).  Good Memories.

He loved Grandpa Ferrell's truck.

Happy Birthday, Melissa!

Beautiful Melissa, a college girl who is one smart gal.

Looks like she should major in Modeling instead of Accounting!

Lillie of Jersey

I have been watching another interesting British Series called "Lillie" and yesterday I found it is based on the life of a real person.  She lived in the Victorian Age and was one of the mistresses of Bertie -- son of Queen Victoria, who was married to Alexandra.  Lillie was considered the most beautiful woman in the world and was sought after by many men.  She became an actress and wealthy in her own right.  It is a very interesting series.  She was called a professional beauty--which was like a model who posed for many paintings.  That is how she got her start.  It is interesting the way men pursue married women and so many have affairs with the knowledge of their wives and/or husbands.

Another series I have put hours into over the last two months I am now on the the second Volume of DVDs--the series "Winds of War" became "War and Remembrance" and is not on the streaming list of Netflix so I get about two DVDs a week and still have many to go.  I am impressed with Netflix and their system.  Very impressive.  Anyway sometimes I can hardly bear to watch what is happening in some of  the Nazi WWII scenes but I have learned a lot and it is a very well done series.  The books would be fun to read but so long...

Since my big TV is broke I am enjoying DVDS, Roku, and TV all in my bedroom.  Good thing I have Mike's old TV--it is a big screen.

I also tracked down the book "Men Are Like Streetcars" written in the 30s and read when I was in high school.  It is a fun book to read.  Strange slang words and expressions they had in the 30's but there are little tips about dating and such.  That must have been what I liked in high school.

I am amazed how much I have been accomplishing on my San Diego Years book, it is tiring but I am glad to get it done though sometimes some memories come back I would just as soon forget but I am glad I have things written down,  I know this exercise is more for me than expecting anyone to read my writings and see my pix but good memories mostly.  Life is Good.  Just wish I had more energy.

Today I did a good food chart and I start my 17 points a day for 30 days...it is Weight Watchers and I really need to get off the fat and sugar and carbs so here I go again.

One thing good about Dish--I like their music stations!!!

Update on the Stewarts!

 

Ryan, Kate and Brynn
Great Grandchildren Cuties...

More Snow

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When the trees are so heavily coated with snow it is an indescribable beauty.  There is no wind and it won't melt for awhile.  Last year it froze instead of melting and many branches broke under the heavy weight.  The snow today is magnificent.

Snow Day

My postbox protected by the big tree.

Daffodils!

Snow creations!



Who I Was Named After

I remember my mother telling me I was named after Janet Gaynor.

Today I watched a silent movie called  "Sunrise" starring Janet Gaynor.  I don't think I had ever seen her in a movie and I did not realize she was a star of the silent films.   This movie was made in 1927.  It is so amazing how much they could emote with their facial expressions and body actions.  You hardly needed the few words on the screen they showed occasionally.

 
It is no wonder I never saw her, she retired from films in 1937 to travel with her husband.

She was one of just a few actresses who successfully went from silent to sound films.  I would love to see her in "A Star is Born"--the original of the remake that I loved Judy Garland in  many years later.

What exciting basketball games today!  And good conference this afternoon.  We had a power outage all morning, but first one this year, life is good.

Bad News

Today I had my annual physical and my cholesterol is up!!!  No wonder--I have been eating like a teenager this winter.  So saying goodbye  to bad habits and tomorrow is a new day.

I am telling myself I can't take a trip to San Diego until I lose 18 pounds.  That is not too much but it will be a good start so do it!!  I just need to cut out all the fat I have been eating


For some reason I had interesting conversations in the waiting room at the Drs.  I should really socialize more, it is good for me.  The first couple were just interested in listening to my Bandido story and we went from there and then the last three were interested in my Montana wolf jacket and wanted to talk about Montana.  One of them had a father in Scobey and another had a cousin in Billings.  They did not know where Cooke City was.  They liked my
jacket.


I finished "To Kill A Mockingbird".  So glad I read it again, and yes, every high school student should read it, everyone should read it.  I also watched another episode of "War and Remembrance" and it was such vivid images of details of the holocaust...so unbelievable what they did. 

When I was in 4th grade our teacher read us episodes of  Toby Tyler (joins the circus) every day after lunch.  I really enjoyed it.  Today I watched a movie that was made about him in the 60's.  Still enjoyed it.  Life is good.

Live in the Mountains

Meagan gave me a sign that said, "If you are lucky enough to live in the moutains, you are lucky enough."  That was so true today.  The sun was shining, it was not too cold and the grounds were still covered with snow.  So beautiful, so peaceful.

Poor Bandido, though.  He missed the driveway twice.  Each time he walked passed it and then turned around and came back.  I was letting him lead us on his leash.  The third time he turned in at the right place.  He didn't know when to turn in at the deck either.  He certainly cannot be outside at all by himself.  Poor Bandido.

Today I have been scanning pictures and listening to music.  I can't believe how much I accomplish since I went off Facebook.  Life is just a lot simpler if you are not involved in everybody's else's life.  As my FEMA friend said, "If anybody wants to communicate with me, they know where I am."  Guess that is true.

I have been writing again in my San Diego Scene and reading a lot of old letters.  It was a good time when we used to write letters, I am so glad I have them.

Pacific Beach in 1964

This is another fun picture I found today.  This was the day after my sister Carole's wedding in Pacific Beach.  I am on the left, then my Mom, sister-in-law Mary, Carole, and my sister Jeanne.  The children are Cheri ( Mary's daughter) Linda, Carole (Jeanne's daughter) and Johnny.  Evidently David and Marilyn did not come to the wedding.  Who had baby Maria?  In most of the pictures, Mary was holding her.  And I didn't see Richard in any of the beach pictures.  He must have had to work after taking off the day before for the wedding.

From 1956

This is another old picture I found of my first year of teaching in San Diego.  I was teaching in South San Diego and had too many students and no control in the second grade I was teaching.  It was my second year as I had taught one year in Billings, Montana.  The big difference is I had only around 20 students in Montana and here I had from 38-40 most of the year.  It was very difficult and depressing. 

My friend Norma (on the end right, who later set me up with Richard) had us all do a three act play and it was a wonderful diversion from my teaching experience.   Fourth from the left is Danny Prager who lives on the same street as Meagan in San Diego.  Second from the right is John who I dated when I first came to San Diego and next to me on my left is Bob who also wanted to date seriously.  He was very nice but I was not interested in anything more than a friendship.  After I met Bill, I didn't date any of the locals.

These young adults all were single and living in Fourth Ward in San Diego so we had lots of fun activites.  There were many more other single adults, also.  It was a very fun ward for us to be in--North Park of San Diego.  I am, of course, the fifth from the right and I was playing the part of the mother in the play and Danny was my son, thus I had powdered grey hair.  The big scene was when I had to kiss my husband...I can't remember if it was Bob or Chuck.  Chuck, on my right, introduced me to Bill when he brought him to my school.  Bill told me later it was love at first sight.  We did have a fun romance with dancing, dinners, sailing, the zoo, and the beach.  San Diego was a fun, sleepy town in the 50's.

1966 Winter Picture

I love to find pictures of Richard with the children.   This was probably the winter of 1966 and we had probably gone up to Julian when it snowed.  Nobody has mittens.  Richard always enjoyed having an outing with the family.  Looks like Linda and Johnny are throwing snowballs on Richard's back.  We probably had hot chocolate and marshmallows before going back home.

We had about four inches of snow last night and it is all melting today.  Glad I fertilized the daffodils yesterday before the snow.

Mitch came up to get the rest of his things and to say goodbye.  He is going to Michigan for awhile to work and stay with his Valko grandparents.  I hope he enjoys the change.  I wonder if they are still having winter there???

Exhausted

Bandido and I are both recuperating from our exhausting ordeal, both of us walking far more than we normally do.  Him seeking home, me seeking him.  I know I didn't have any sleep Friday night and I am sure he didn't either as he wound his way down hill to the lakeside.

At least we are both sleeping a lot now and that is good.

It was interesting to go online and read of other traumatic experiences of people whose pets have disappeared, some eventually finding resolve and others none.  I can see why people seek others online for similar experiences so they receive some kind of understanding in their anxiety.  When a pet is lost or a loved one leaves, you have the same kind of guilty feeling.  What should I have done that I didn't.? Was I negligent?  Did I not show enough caring and love?

It has been a long time since Bandido has wanted to snuggle next to me like he used to--almost like an Alzheimer's patient, not knowing who he is or who you are, but I have been trying to get him to cuddle more since he came back.  Does it matter to him?  I am not sure?  His eyes are glazed, I know he sees the shadow of my outline but does he see me???

"Yesterday was just awful"

...from the musical "Annie".

Last night while it was still light Bandido was on the deck but not ready to come in.  When I went for him again he was gone.  As I have said before, Bandido has only gotten off the deck once in the past year and that is when the snow was as high as the deck...and yet here he was... gone.

I looked everywhere in the house.  Had I let him in and forgotten???  When Mike came home we looked again and again, even under the beds.  It was so dark it was hard to see in the yards but I checked back and front over and over again.  He was gone...but where?

At 2 am I still l hadn't been able to sleep and Mike was up, too.  He drove us around just in case Bandido had been hit by a car or was on the side of the road.  Nothing.

Bandido has 4 tags--one with my cell phone and his name, one with my house phone and his name, one with his rabies information and one with his Vet's name and number.  I thought if someone had taken him in out of the cold,  they would call in the morning.  At 9 AM I called the Security...no one had reported a found dog. 

I walked all the lots near my home.  I had read on the internet about how dogs go off to die by themselves.  I looked under all the decks.  I walked up and down the street and across the street.  Everytime the phone rang I thought it will either be good news or bad news but sooner or later he has to be seen and someone will call.  There are not too many in the LAAC this time of year.  Most are summer homes so it could be awhile.

But at about 4 pm the call came.  Mary at Security in a cheerful voice said I would find Bandido laying on the beach at such and such a number on Peninsula.  After I hung up I thought he must be dead or why would he just be laying there?  But she did sound cheerful.  I realized Mike had my car so asked my neighbor to drive me down.

When we got there my neighbor talked to the man of the house and I walked directly to the beach behind their house.  I could see him laying in a fluffy ball, not moving, and I started to cry.  But when I walked up to him I could see he was shaking like a cold leaf but when I wrapped him in my towel he cuddled up and perked up and got more perky as we neared home.

After a long drink and good food and some warm cuddling he was soon walking around acting very normal but inspecting everything and he looked very comforted to be home.  He keeps going back to eat and eat, he must have used a lot of energy last night.

When I later tried to take him for a walk or even use the run he did not want to.  He was either very tired or afraid, I am not sure which.  Since Bandido cannot see very well or hear very well it must have been very frightening for him to walk all the way from my house at the top of the peninsula down to the east shore of the peninsula.  We will never know why or how he did it...his left leg slips out from under him quite often and he walks in circles a lot.  No wonder he was so tired.  It is a lot further than I could have walked, that is for sure.  Mike thinks he was interacting with the raccoons...we will never know.

When we moved here 13 years ago.

At least for now, he has another lease on life and deserves a lot of cuddling, we better go see Dr. Bob and see what we can give him in comfort for his last days.   Hard to believe Richard and I picked him out of a litter 16 years ago in November, just before Richard died.  He has been a good, good friend to me.

Happy 25th Birthday for Matt!

Happy Birthday Lea!

Lea turns 12!  Have a wonderful year, Lea!  Last year before those teens!

Update on Keira

 

 

 

Dancing With The Stars

Is going to be wonderful to watch this year.  Such beautiful, happy people who are so good!!!

Today I watched an excellent documentary on "To Kill a Mockingbird" so I need to check out the book and read it again.  I did not know the author liv ed next door to Truman Capote and they were great friends until she won the Pulitzer Prize. Her name was Harper Lee and she never wrote another novel, some essays, but not a novel.  However, she was able to live on what she made on that one book, which is almost unheard of...


I have really been enjoying the musical "Smash" but I am afraid they will drop it.  They like the crazy shows the young people like instead of a good musical I think.   I don't like part of the story line, however, it is going to ruin the show, always have to have a little trash I am afraid.

Bandido almost pranced down the street today with his coat on in the crisp air, he must be feeling well.  Life is good!

Oh, yes, it is easy to keep up with my scriptures with BYUtv on Roku.  Love it.  And I am switching to Dish TV--hope that is good, they are cheaper with lots of freebies for 3 mo on some things and a year on others and I will have tv in my bedroom at no extra cost.  The rep I talked to was excellent, so unusual but he did a great job and was so patient with me.  Life is good!

Oscar Movies

I've been making my way through the Oscar movies.  DirectTV is giving back $10 if you watch 4 this month.  Last night I watched Descendants and enjoyed it very much.  Clooney did a great job.

Tonight I watched "My Week with Marilyn".  I thought Michelle Williams really had Marilyn down very well.  Marilyn had something no one can really capture but she did remarkably well and she deserved an Oscar.  I haven't seen the Thatcher movie yet, anxious to see Meryl Streep in that.  Anyway I really enjoyed the Marilyn movie.  The fellow who played Colin was great and I am anxious to see him again in another movie.  I will have to see who he is.

We have had the strangest assortment of types of snow this week and then it all melts.  What a strange winter or spring?  One day there were large 50 cent size, very wet, blobs of snow coming down very close together and very fast.  Never seen anything quite like it.  The next day it was more like artificial snow, tiny dots and very dry.  It also melted fast.   But I am happy the yard is clean of branches, the buds are out and the daffodils pushing up and spring will soon be here.  Life is good.

I think Mike and Mitch are enjoying each other--nice to have them here.  With two of them here I have had light bulbs replaced, smoke alarms rearmed with new batteries, driveway and walks cleaned and they are both working at putting the toilet seat down.  Mike had had jokes about it on one of his shows so I did express it was something they should learn to do...

Bridges of Madison County

I made my pies this morning, and I should note it doesn't work to substitute potato and corn starch for flour when making crumb crust.  It just liquifies away.  Pie still tastes good but you don't have the crunchy crust.

Anyway after making my pies I watched "Bridges of Madison County", one of my favorite movies.  Meryl Streep and Clint Eastwood are both such amazing actors and I hadn't noticed the beautiful music in the movie.  There are also some wonderful lines in the movie, I want to go back and write down.

I remember the first time I watched it which must have been in 1995 I felt a little naughty liking it so much because it is about being unfaithful in your marriage.   But there is a lot to learn from that movie also in just making your life the very best you can and blooming where you are planted--Living the moment--appreciating the wonder of life and the beauty of the world.  One line at the beginning of the movie was Clint Eastwood  saying:

"I had some wonderful dreams, they didn't all work out, but I'm glad I had them." 

To me this is a movie with such feelings, scenery, music and messages it is a classic to watch again and again.  I wonder what else the author has written.

Winter Wonderland

Today is a one of the kinds of days I love most in Lake Almanor.  I should write a poem about it.  The snow is falling with large wet flakes and sticking to every branch and wire and it is beautiful, so beautiful.  Bandido, even though I put his coat on, did not like it though and turned around immediately to get back in the house.

Mitch is here and he filled up the wood bin yesterday and I had gathered more kindling from around the lot so we are well set.  I also made a run to Walmart so our cupboards are full.  And we don't have to go anywhere today, I hope.  Lovely day to sit home by the fire and play their games and read my books.  Life is good.  I think I will make apple pie, Lake Almanor apple pie, in fact, I think I will make two, one with regular crust for the boys and one with a gluten free crust for me.  Yes, life is good!

Hair

I have always wondered how certain famous people always appear to have the same hairdo month after month.  I have never been able to achieve that.  That must be why they have their own stylist travel with them on trips and such.

I have had many different people cut my hair through the years, I have found it extremely difficult for them to keep the hair cut the same from month to month. 

For instance, I had let my hair grow out after a really bad short hair cut.  So when I went to a stylist I have used in the past and I knew was good I went prepaed with pictures of how I wanted it to look.  She complained that it wasn't right for me but she spent a lot of time working toward it and it was perfect.  I loved dealing with my hair all month.  It worked for me!!  Yea, I have found the perfect length, etc. etc. etc. I just need it trimmed each month...or so I thought.

I went back five weeks later and I assumed (Motto: Never Assume) but I assumed she would trim the 1/4 inch off or so and keep it the same.  Not so!!!!  It ended up too short on the crown, too short on the top front, too long in the back for the too short on top, etc.  In other words I went home with a hair cut that does not work and was totally different and shorter from the month before. 

I have found this so true.  They cut that first haircut perfectly and the second one is always too short.  What should I say or do to see this does not happen?  I guess I must take the pictures every time and let them know I do not trust them.

I have also found trying to explain what you want and what they hear you want is never the same.

One stylist did tell me it was very difficult to trim a razor cut so it was the same as last time when I told her to keep it the same and  just trim it.  And, of course, it was not.  Anyway, one of the frustrations of my life.

I just heard noise from another frustration of my life...Bandido is waking up and I must hurry and let him out before he pees on the kitchen floor.  Old age affects all of us in unkind ways.

Oh, yes, Bandido has a too short haircut, too, so we are both unhappy with our looks this month.

Winds of War

I am watching this series that Herman Wouk wrote about WWII.  It really struck me in one scene.  So many times soldiers are criticized or punished for killing innocent people yet, when Germany attacked Poland in 1939 the poles were trying to leave their cities and the Naziis came at them over and over with planes with machine guns.  There were no enemy soldiers  they were shooting at or munitions they were bombing, just innocent people trying to get away.

Listening to the devious lies of Hitler reminded me again of the gross mistrust I have of some of our government leaders in these latter days.  There is so much deception and greed and power grabbing with no regard for what is best for America and her people.  Hitler was able to get away with so much in the beginning because the people could not conceive of the evil he was capable of.  Many called him crazy but still couldn't understand.  He actually told the world the Poles had been attacking Germany for months before Germany retaliated in their surprise attack.  He was proud of the fact he was deceiving England and France with his lies.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."   Edmund Burke

I don't like the character Ali McGraw plays anymore than I liked the character she played in "Love Story".   She doesn't seem like someone guys would be so in love with, very manipulative and self serving.  In "Love Story" I hardly could sit through it.  I did not like her foul tongue and as I say I did not think she was lovable at all.

"The First Thing We Must Do is Understand"

--The second is to put our understanding into action."   Good advice from President Dieter F. Uchtdorf.  While I was having a fatty intolerance attack tonight I read something I want to remember.

President Uchtdorf warned of the tendency to complicate simple things. "Too often, we complicate the beauty and simplicity of the gospel of Jesus Christ with endless lists of meticulous expectations.  however, when we focus on the 'why' of the gospel, much of the confusion fades away.  Why are we asked to obey the commandments?  Why is the Atonement of Jesus Christ of such value to us?"...

"Unfortunately, we sometimes don't seek revelation or answers from the scriptures...because we think we know the answers already...as good as our previous experience may be, if we stop asking questions, stop thinking, stop pondering, we can thwart the revelations of the Spirit."

"Please open your heart and minds to the will of heaven, and I promise that the Spirit will reveal the things that matter most--for you, your family...bring your decisions and efforts before the Lord in your daily prayers and ask for further light and direction.  Trust Him.  He knows you, and He loves you."

Yea!! Maryanne to the Rescue!

I put out an email to see if anyone knew where the new dog groomer is in Chester and Maryanne came to the rescue.  She had remembered seeing the sign some place so on way to her work today she scoped out Chester till she found it and called me the telephone number and directions.  Thanks to Maryanne Bandido has a long overdue grooming appointment tomorrow.  I hope the groomer will not be too hard on him and just shave him all off instead of trying to make him look good.  His hair is very thick and a little mangy.

My Hot Dog Craving--Big Mistake!!

Yesterday when I saw the Miller Hot Dogs and got the craving it was a big mistake!  I bought them and made my own gluten free hot dog buns and they worked!!!   And they are so good!  So good that I had them three meals in a row and little else except for Diet Dr Pepper and caramels made of butter, sugar and corn syryp. 

Tonight I paid the price of my wacky diet.  I had a huge fat intolerance or processed hot dog intolerance reaction tonight...evidently I couldn't digest so much accumulated fat with no veggies or anything else...

But the buns are good!!!  Just remember, Janet, you have to eat sensibly and if you indulge in a huge hot dog it will not be more than one every two weeks or so!!  I took a picture of my buns but I can't find the camera cord--story of my life, always something lost.  And Janet, stop making those caramels, they are making you sick!!!  And fat!!!!

American Idol

Little Jessica Sanchez sang "I'll Always Love You" and made us all cry.  She is another Whitney--so amazing.

It is going to be hard to choose this year.  There are many good ones!!

Seventeenth Summer

While looking for new books on my audio "Library to Go"  I couldn't believe I saw " Seventeenth Summer", a book I had read when I was around 14 or 15.  There were only two book titles I remembered from my teen age years.  This was one and the other was "Men Are Like Streetcars". 

I was curious to see if it would be as interesting to me now as it was then.  And it was.  Evidently a well-written book can be for all ages.   I tried to go to sleep last night and finish it the next day but I had to keep turning it on until I was finished.  It was so very nostalgic to me.  So much like my high school life.  However, I had read it before my 17th summer.  And strangely enough my 17th summer was the most fun of my high school days so this book was even more nostalgic now than it was at 14.  It is a story of first love and I could very well relate to all those new feelings and shyness and concern for the future.

My family was not as formal as this family but many other things were similar.  My 17th summer was the summer before I was a senior and my boyfriend would be heading for college in the fall.  In the book the girl was headed for college and the boy was moving to another state.  

From a blogger I read that the book was originally written in 1942 by Maureen Daly before she was 20 years old.   I read it in 1947-48.  It was made into an audiobook last year and the book was reprinted in 2010.  I don't know that teenagers of today would really wade through the book.  It was such a different time and circumstances, I doubt they could relate at all.  This particular blogger was a teacher of 7-8 graders and quite enjoyed it herself but also wondered if her students would feel the same.  The only thing I thought was a little strange is that it was written in 1942 during WWII and that was not a part of the book at all.  I assume the author did not want to date the book by that fact or muddy the theme of the book.

It reminded me so much of my hometown and my sister just sent me a poem written by a classmate of the class of 1950 about our hometown Glendive, Montana.  He was the brother of my friend Carla and Hubert had written it for the '49-'52 years class reunion last year (which I did not attend).  I hope he won't mind if I put it in my blog as a good memory.

Glendive-2011

Sandwiched between the Yellowstone and "Hungry Joe"
Our town bears witness:
  To those who lived here long ago
  To those who live here still
  To those of us who were nurtured here and thus can call it our childhood home.

Our town provides a legacy:
  For strong, resilient folks
  Surviving in a tough, demanding land
  Where heat in summer has reached 110 degrees,
  Where days have reached to 40 below in a crisp, snowy, winter freeze.

Before us, the Indians called this land "Makoshika"
Yet, for those of us who call it home
The "badlands" has a beauty of its own.

We who are privileged to come together in this place
To renew our spirits, can say:
We have been here and shared our love and laughter
And will strive to leave it better
For those who come here after.

Hubert Carl Huebl,MD   7-9-2011    Class of 1950

Girl only house party at 17 in Glendive.   As I say we were not as formal as the family in the book.

I told Melissa today that I was surprised the author had the characters doing so much smoking in high school and one even a pipe!!!  In our school it was not so prevalent, at least until they went to college or started working.l 

San Diego trip Needed?

Last week I went in for another zap on the cancerous looking  spot on the side of my head.  Dr Marc made an appointment for my annual this month but he took the opportunity to listen to my carotid artieries. 

The one on my right was "wide open".  That is the one I had surgery on in 2010.  But he said the one on the left is sounding strange and he said I should make that appointment for a revisit to my surgeon.  They called in January and I said I had no idea when I would be down again.  Guess I better make that appointment and also one with my dermatoligist and then head South and pray that neither of them finds anything remotely dangeous this time.

I read an article on 'being prepared' for death at anytime.  Guess I better get busy on my To Do list.  In 1997, after Richard died, I made my 25  list and there are only a few things left to do

Here they are:

1. Get physically fit to where I can run a mile or longer and feel OK (don't want to take the risk of falling, this will never happen)
2. Get down to 140 lbs...(that will never happen).
3. Get rid of my spare tire...(ditto).
4. Read all the classics. (what are all the classics?)  I have read alot and really have enjoyed them!)
5. See the Palmyra Pageant.
6. See New England in the fall.
7. Go to Branson and see lots of shows. (Not now, just had tornados)
8. Be a good missionary.
9. Exercise every day.

Most all the trip things I wanted to do, I did!!!  It is mostly the self-discipline items that are still escaping me but I would say doing 16 out of 25 is Very Good!  It's a good life.

So what were the other 16 I did: Remember Richard had just passed away a few months earlier.  I was still resolving all the business problems and was living in an apartment at James and Camber's Pacific Beach home and Camber encouraged me to write this and put it on my fridg.

1. Own a home again--English cottage or Mountain Home. (the latter I do, since 1999)
2. Feel happy.
3. Feel joy.
4. Feel contented and secure (it comes and goes like the ebb and flow of the sea).
5. Go on a Cruise (Did the Mediterranean, Norway to England, Vancouver and Ensenada)
6. Feel love and loved.
7. Feel of worth.
8. Enjoy talking and listening to people again.
9. Enjoy dancing again (Ok, it is by myself but that is something.  I did dance with two guys though and had fun for a few minutes)
10. Be able to stop working (Well I did, but it wasn't  because I had enough money).
11. Have enough money to live comfortably. (I am surviving, given up a lot)
12. Travel to Sweden (Actually have done it twice!!!) Plus London, Denmark, Greece, Italy, Croatia, Maui, Hong Kong, Singapore, Guam, Germany, Maryland, West Virginia, Texas (several times and places), Florida, Louisiana, Delaware, New York, Colorado, Utah, Montana, Wyoming, Oregon, Mississippi, Tennessee, Sacramento, Las Vegas, Tahoe, Park City, Rancho Santa Fe, El Cajon, Pacific Beach, Carlsbad, Seattle, Vancouver, Canada, San Jose, Napa Valley!  Life is good.
13. Read Scriptures everyday (doing pretty well on that--helps to be able to listen sometimes)
14. Meet Barbara Striesand (No, I didn't but I crossed it off my list as not wanted after all)
15. Look in the mirror and like who I see. (I've grown comfortable with that old face)
16. Visit Switzerland (No, I didn't, but I flew over the Alps and crossed it off my list)

So, what new goals do I have?  Have to think about that, still have plenty above to work on.

A Time To Kill

The best thing about having a bad memory is you can watch an old movie and not remember what is going to happen at all.

The thing I do remember is reading the book and the emotion it evoked in me.  A good writer can do amazing things to your feelings.  I loved this book and what it helped me visualize of a place and events I was not really a part of.  Great job John Grisham.

Seven Dwarfs

Lo and behold I found my Seven Dwarf's furniture, such as it is. I had such ambition when I started out. I intended on carving their beds. I did Doc's and it was so hard I gave up on the others. I could picture those headboards and a carved piano in my mind just like in the movie. Not that easy, I am not that clever,  so it is what it is.

What was fun is living at the Hardy home while I worked on them and having Kelsi enjoy each new thing I did and having such fun playing with them.  It was funny, too, that the dolls disappeared for the longest time and no one could find them.  I had let Kelsi take them to bed with her one night.  Long after I had gone home, I got the word they had finally found them in an obscure place.  Such is family life.

Oh, yes, and a few years ago when Kate was here (she was about 2) Snow White disappeared.  We never have found her but Carole sent me duplicates so now I have spares to lose which I keep in a big hat box by the couch.  Maybe when Keira comes there will be someone to play with them.

Melissa's Wall Creation

Wow, I am flattered that my granddaughter Melissa would use a picture of me from May 1959 on her wall arrangement about the sea.  She also used John, the picture we are all familiar with and which I love.

The pictures are taken about 20 years apart.  I remember well when mine was taken.  Bill and I had gone to the beach for one last time.

 Bill and I  had been planning marriage but now were breaking up.  I went off to BYU for the summer soon after this picture was taken.    That is when I took my great Speech class and private singing (it didn't help me much but it was fun). 

 Richard came up and introduced himself after Church  just before Labor Day 1959, the first weekend I was back in San Diego, and we were married six weeks later.

For the Boys

Last night one of my favorite Bette Midler movies was on.  'For the Boys' was about two peformers who entertained the troops in WWII, the Korean War, and Viet Nam.  Besides loving her singing it was very interesting to see how differently they portrayed the three wars and the soldiers in the wars.  It was a very sad commentary on the last two events especcially.

My memory goes back to age 8 years old when I walked home from school with my neighbor Shirley sometimes.  Her parents must have discussed the presidency of the US alot because Shirley was always a fountain of information about such things.  I remember so well that we thought the leaders of the nation really were amazing and knew so well what they were doing.
I wonder how soon those illusions passed.

I would love to have the respect for the leaders that I had then.  Now it is very difficult to find even a few that you look to for wise leadership.

Gluten Free Bread

Just had fresh bread with butter and honey, yum, yum. I've made about three different kinds of gluten free bread from the recipe book Maria gave me for Christmas. This one has eggs, honey and yogurt in it. Very tasty, very light and so much better than the store bought gluten free bread and you don't have to knead it or let it raise before baking. I freeze individual slices so it will last me for awhile.  Oh, yes, made from potatoe and corn starch instead of wheat flour.

Insight into Isaiah

I found a wonderful site on byutv.org.  It is 30 episodes of 'Insight into Isaiah' as in 30 half hour discussions of Isaiah in the Old Testament.  It is wonderful, lots of visuals, so interesting  and you can learn so much.  It helps, of course, with Isaiah in the Book of Mormon.

Naturally since I have Roku I can watch it on the big TV rather than my computer.  Life is good.

The sun is shining, walks and roads are melted and it is beautiful to behold.  No mud, yet, either.

Poor Bandido

We all know Bandido  has poor eyesight.  Today he almost froze because of it.

I let him out on the back deck where I had shoveled a nice snow free area for him to go pee.  Since there was so much snow I did not hook him up to his leash for a run (slow walk) to the backyard.

While I was busy at the computer at the dining room table I soon wondered why he had not come back to the door to be let in.

Lo and behold he was nowhere to be seen, until I noticed a wandering trail of a paw marked tunnel in the snow that went round and round below the deck and then trailed off in to the side yard.  I ran to the front door and looked out to see if the trail led to the front of the house.  Not so.  I ran back and peered over the side of the deck and there was Bandido wandering around in the deep snow in the neighbor's yard.

All tuckered out after his snow trip.

  He had so many balls of snow stuck to him I had to put him in the bathtub and warm his legs with warm water and melt the snow. 

Poor thing, this is the first time in a year or so that he stepped off the deck by himself.   With the snow about the same heighth I am sure he just went the wrong way.  What if I had forgotten I let him out????  I shudder to think.  With his bad eyes and deaf ears and my bad memory,  we are a dangerous duo.

Old Man Trees

"Darn, we thought spring was here!"

Fear Thou Not!

As I was listening to the TV today I heard someone say "I have never seen so much fear in the faces of the people as I followed the campaign trail this year."  And then he listed all the reasons we have to fear and I understood well what he was saying.  And then I turned to the Church News and on the back was an editorial 'Fear Thou Not'.

I quote "In these times, many people are pessimistic toward the future...and then a list of all negative things going on and then "However, as valid as these issues may be, we do not need to lose hope. The adversary would seduce us into pessisism for, with that attitude, he has greater control." 

And then  a list of suggestions of how to avoid this fear and finally a quote from the best example of optimism President Thomas S. Monson.  This is what he said in October 2011.

"In this world where nearly everything seems to be changing, His constancy is something on which we can rely, an anchor to which we can hold fast and be safe, lest we be swept away into uncharted waters.

Some of you may feel restricted by the code of conduct to which we in the Church adhere. My brothers and sisters, I declare to you, however, that there is nothing which can bring more joy into our lives or more peace to our souls than the Spirit which can come to us as we follow the Savior and keep the commandments. That Spirit cannot be present at the kinds of activities in which so much of the world participates.

We must be vigilant in a world which has moved so far from that which is spiritual. It is essential that we reject anything that does not conform to our standards, refusing in the process to surrender that which we desire most: eternal life in the kingdom of God. The storms will still beat at our doors from time to time, for they are an inescapable part of our existence in mortality. We, however, will be far better equipped to deal with them, to learn from them, and to overcome them if we have the gospel at our core and the love of the Savior in our hearts.

As the winds of change swirl around us and the moral fiber of society continues to disintegrate before our very eyes, may we remember the Lord’s precious promise to those who trust in Him: “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.” Isaiah 41:10."

What a Promise!  How great to have a consistent light of hope in this dark world.

A Train In Winter

I just finished the book Maria sent to me 'A Train in Winter'.  It is the story of 230 women who were a part of the French Resistance in WWII and who were hunted down and imprisoned and eventually sent to Auschwitz. 

Only 49 survive and return to France after the war.  The saddest part to me is that these 49 who survive do not really have happy lives after the war.  It is as if they cannot get the horror of what they went through out of their memories or out of their physical health.  They feel they cannot really put into understandable words what they went through either.

I myself had not read such personal descriptions of life in Auschwitz.  I did not know there were many others there besides the Jews.  Although the mission was to exterminate the Jews, many others were there to work for the Nazis, but they were horribly treated and most of them died also.  (Actually the Nazis had these women sign papers that they would not tell what went on in the camps.)  How could they ( the Nazis) who were losing the war at this time, expect them to honor that?

I cried for awhile after I finished.  I felt so ashamed of my every feeling sad about any experiences I have had--they cannot, of course, be even a particle of what these women had gone through.

One thing that was interesting is this quote: "Their own particular skills as women, caring for others and being practical, made them, they told themselves, less vulnerable than men to harsh conditions and despair.  Adaptability was crucial, resignation fatal.  The inability to undo a vision of life as it should be and not cope with what it was, led, as they had observed. to apathy and the condition of musulmans, those more dead than alive.  They did their best to stay clean, to wash their faces in the snow or icy brooks, believing that it made them both healthier and more dignified.  And they wanted, passionately, to live, to survive the war, and to describe to the world exactly what they had been through and what they had witnessed."

Also interesting was that the older women (30-50s) could adapt more than the younger ones (20 and younger who were healthier).  They also knew they needed each other and so kept that friendship and caring throughout their imprisonment.  You could not survive alone.

Toward the end, the Nazis were speedily trying to get rid of the emaciated bodies before the Yanks would discover them.   "One night, Marie-Claude heard terrible cries; next morning she learnt that because the gas chambers had run out of Zyklon B pellets, the smaller children had been thrown directly on to the flames. 'When we tell people,' she said to the others, 'who will believe us?'  The Gypsies had many babies while at Auschwitz and the Nazis would bash the baby heads to the wall to kill them.  If a mother fought them, they beat her to death also.

'A Train in Winter'  is written from interviews with these women and their families; German, French, and Polish archives; and documents held by WWII resistance organizations to uncover a dark chapter of history that offers an inspiring portrait of ordinary people, of bravery and survival--and the remarkable, enduring power of female friendship.  This was written by Caroline Moorehead.

I had to ask myself.  Would I have been brave enough to be a part of the Resistance or would I have fled to the country  with my children?

The saddest line was  "Didn't we pray enough?"  asked by one of the younger women. 

Shingles are On!

I'm finished working on my Seven Dwarf House for awhile.  I can't find the furniture I made in San Diego though.  But Matt is here and we are going to clean the garage tomorrow so maybe I will find them.  Oh, well, I think this view is prettier anyway.

All in a Day's Work

If I get nothing else done in the day, at least if I did my hour of family research indexing I can feel I have accomplished something.

Today I also completed one half of the shingling on the doll house.

And I tested the Gluten free Snickerdoodle recipe.  And amazingly they are the best Snickerdoodles I have ever tasted.  Who needs wheat?  And only 65 calories in a cookie!

Furthermore I watched "Breaking Dawn" and although I still don't think the star is much of an actress I must say it was filmed pretty much as I imagined it.  I really like it when the movies follow the books.  It is not a film series of much depth but I was amazed to hear it had won a British Award for Best Child (Teen) movie of the year.  Really?  The photography is great, anyway.

Bruce continues to be downhearted because I never take him for a walk.  I think my throat is getting better, maybe next week, Bruce.

Silver Gate Cabin 1963

This is a picture of Carole a year before she married. At the cabin, of course.

This is my brother Dick, his son Roddy with Mom, Carole and Dad.  Carole is the only one of these still living.  Mom and Dad would have been 61 in this picture.

Happy Birthday Keira!

Here is Keira dressed in the Raggedy Ann dress I made for Meagan on her first birthday and holding the Raggedy Ann doll I also made.  I had no idea Meagan still had this.

I love it.  Now If I can only find a picture of Meagan!

Here is Keira with her Birthday Girl Hat but no birthday smile!!

Island at War

Today I watched all six episodes of "Island at War".  At times I wondered why I suffer through these WWII movies because the mean German soldiers get me so upset but...  There were also some very nice German soldiers that made you realize they did not want war either.  They were forced to do what they had to and after all they are all just people, no matter whose side they were on.

The human dynamics were so interesting.  It was very well done and I wished there had been more episodes!!

A side note of interest was the Grandma making potato flour from potatos and commenting  on how many potatos it takes to make flour.  Until I started making gluten free pancakes and such from cornstarch and potato starch I was not even aware there was potato flour.

Swimming Pool in Glendive in 1924

One of my childhood friends, George, sent me some pictures of my hometown.  This was taken in 1924 and I did not move there until I was 15 months old in 1934. 

This is a picture of what was called the Heights and was the North Side of town.  The swimming pool, which later had walks and diving boards and a lovely grass park built all around it with a lovely building with rooms to change your clothes and etc., was just down from our house.

In fact, I can see the Northern Pacific Hospital in the top right and right in front of it was the big house we bought in 1940.  I had heard it was about 50 years old when we bought it.  We had it remodeled when I was in high school.  On the left side of the chimney was a small garage only wide enough for a horse and buggy.

The swimming pool was all cement and had lots of cracks that would be tarred over every year.  It was deep enough that we later had a 10 foot diving board, a 5 foot diving board and a big slide.

Below is a picture of my friend Carla and I with some of the boys from our class.  We were sitting at the edge of the pool.  This was probably about 1947 or 8 or so.

Shingling

Well, I finally started shingling the roof of my dollhouse and I am not enjoying it at all. It is going to be a tedious job, I can see. And what am I going to do with the house when I am finished. I don't know why I start these things as I never want to finish them.


The other day on Dr. Phil the psychiatrist tried to tell these fat ladies that they ate too much because someone made them feel unloved. I do not believe that at all. I had a sweet tooth when I was young, skinny and loved just as much as I do now when I am alone. I do not believe that is why some people like to eat and some others are so disciplined.


Dr. Phil did not let Donny Osmond finish telling about why he has so much energy today. Donny said he had been taking protactim for two years and really believed in it. Dr. Phil did not let him elaborate but I looked it up on the internet and it is very expensive. $40 for a 30 day supply and it looks like you have to commit to having it shipped every month. Not for me even if it would be give me more energy and new cells.


Today I made pancakes again even though I thought I was going to stick strictly to protein for awhile and drop some winter weight. I just can't commit to giving up the comfort foods.



One positive thing, the moon has been spectacular the last few nights. It is so big and bright through the trees, very beautiful.


For some reason I have been filling out my timeline on Facebook. Why??? I don't know, but it is a nice program to remember the important things in your life. What I will ever do with it, though, I cannot imagine.

Being Chosen

Today I really enjoyed the Sunday School Lesson on the Atonement given by Jane.  And one point was made so well about receiving tender mercies from the Lord.

It was taken from a talk David Bednar gave at Conference in 2005 just six months after his calling to be a General Authority.  He was talking about how some us feel we are not privileged to be the chosen by the Lord. And then went on and used scripture to explain who the chosen are.  It was quite enlightening.

Who Are They Whom the Lord Has Chosen to Receive His Tender Mercies?

The word chosen in 1 Nephi 1:20 [1 Ne. 1:20] is central to understanding the concept of the Lord’s tender mercies. The dictionary indicates that chosen suggests one who is selected, taken by preference, or picked out. It also can be used to refer to the elect or chosen of God (Oxford English Dictionary Online, second ed. [1989], “Chosen”).

Some individuals who hear or read this message erroneously may discount or dismiss in their personal lives the availability of the tender mercies of the Lord, believing that “I certainly am not one who has been or ever will be chosen.” We may falsely think that such blessings and gifts are reserved for other people who appear to be more righteous or who serve in visible Church callings. I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are available to all of us and that the Redeemer of Israel is eager to bestow such gifts upon us.

To be or to become chosen is not an exclusive status conferred upon us. Rather, you and I ultimately determine if we are chosen. Please now note the use of the word chosen in the following verses from the Doctrine and Covenants:

“Behold, there are many called, but few are chosen. And why are they not chosen?

“Because their hearts are set so much upon the things of this world, and aspire to the honors of men” (D&C 121:34–35; emphasis added).

I believe the implication of these verses is quite straightforward. God does not have a list of favorites to which we must hope our names will someday be added. He does not limit “the chosen” to a restricted few. Rather, it is our hearts and our aspirations and our obedience which definitively determine whether we are counted as one of God’s chosen.

Jane also gave "the Bicyle" story from Robinson's book "Believe in Christ"or something like that.  It was the book Roddy read just before passing away and he challenged everyone with "I know you believe in Christ but do you believe Him?"  I am glad he received that testimony of understanding the atonement before he passed away.  It was a good reminder that it is not working to do our best everyday that makes us worthy for the atonement but our realizing the need for the Savior in our life no matter how much we do.

Favorite Picture

I love this picture taken in the backyard of our Pacific Beach home in about 1964.

Maria, Johnny and Linda already to go some place, Church, probably.

Johnny liked to sit on the front row and Linda with him.

Joan Allen was usually liking to have Maria sit on her lap throughout Sacrament Meeting.

Woe is Me...

My sore throat and earache have returned--why?  I had antibiotics for five days which was supposed to be good for 10 days but I figured it was the night of the 10th day when the sore throat returned, so what is that all about?  

Today I watched "Edward VIII" miniseries, in preparation for watching Madonna's W.E.  I am also interesting in watching Madonna at the SuperBowl tomorrow.  I think she is an amazing intelligent and creative person who works very hard to do what is important to her.  Lots of discipline I think.  Will be interesting to see how she does on both counts.

I was interested in some Widipedia info about the Duke and Duchess of Windsor--they were called the greatest parasites of the 20th Century.  She had jewels worth millions and their furnishings ended up selling for millions.  They were obviously supported by the British Government--but she stated it was very difficult to keep the "great romance" going.  It was obvious from what I read and saw that they did not really think the Brits would make him abdicate and I am sure it did not make Mrs. Simpson happy at all.  Also they may have been sympathetic with the Nazis.  There have been so many movies and books written about them, how would you know what was really true.

Since I will be watching the Super Bowl alone tomorrow as Mike has to work (doubt he would watch it anyway) I had him bring home some Buffalo Wings and Nachos stuff and I made a gluten free chocolate cake.

Oh, yes, more gluten free excellent recipes.  Yesterday I tried the Raised Doughnuts and today I tried the Chocolate Cake.  Both excellent, which is not really a good thing for me.  The recipes are so simple and so delicious, it is a good thing I am out of potato starch.

I always want to spell potato with an e on the end...spellcheck does not like that.  Where did I learn that?

I talked to Myrna for a long time tonight.  Her daughter wants her to make decisions about what to do with her Manhattan Beach house and all her collections and furniture in it.  It makes Myrna very sad, though she realizes she is very lucky to have those kind of decisions to make.  She had spoon, special plates, and Merrry Go Round music box collections.  It is so hard to know what to do with all those treasures and whether to rent or sell her house.  I don't envy her decisions.

Happy Endings Please!!!

I just enjoyed watching another BBC Masterpiece Series "Downton Abbey" but there was no happy ending.  I don't like that.  It is so amazing how they were able to carry out those class distinctions for so long in Britain...and maybe they still do.

Last night I finished the audio of the "The Shaken Earth" and I skipped some of the middle cds as it was just too long as they looked for the daughter's mother after the earthquake.  I just couldn't take it anymore as she talked about her "mama" so I put on the 10th CD and at least there was the happy ending finally.

I just don't have any energy for completing any of my projects right now, not sure why but I am spending too much time reading, listening to cds and watching TV!!!  And even then it takes a lot to hold my interest--I must have the winter boredom blues or something.

The sun has been shining but there is a chill in the air and I build a fire about 4 every day amd keep it going til 10 or 11.   Very comfy.

Yesterday I went back to Shelley to cut my hair.  I showed her what I wanted and after giving me a hard time about the fact my hair was nothing like the ladies in the pictures she did a super job of cutting it just the way I wanted.  Of course, next month I may want it all different but she is very good.

She was telling me she sold 17 houses last year which is truly amazing.  She has learned how to sell the short sales and foreclosures.  The last one on the peninsula she sold for $375,000 right on the lake!!  Good deals out there for those with money.  Wish I had the ambition to learn how to do it but I don't. 

Surprise, surprise, the last two days Bandido has run as fast as he can and loved it.  Mike spoiled the dogs by putting something delicious on their dry food and now they beg every day for more.